My Life In Music

How Was It For You?

2007-12-20T00:11:00.000+01:00

So 2007....

New places I went to
- Transylvania- if only for a few hours. Won't go back to Romania again so this was my last chance to get out of Bucharest and see something else.
- Colorado- cold. And if you don't have the air con you get static electricity shocks off the lightswiches
- Las Vegas- a place where you get vodka and coke for a dollar, all kids are banned from the important areas and you can play computer poker. When can I go back?
- Hamburg- so lucky with the weather- was over 30 degrees all weekend. I loved it, so much to do, so much more cosmopolitan and multicultural compared to where I live, so big...

Great things that happened this year:
- Going to the US and seeing my sisters. It was particularly cute to see the littlest one getting on so well with the boyf.
- Rugby!!! Great weekend in St.Gallen and we won the 2nd division again. Started playing 15s in the top division.
- Glastonbury. Special highlight was Glenn Tilbrook on Friday night in the Leftfield Tent, in particular the sing-a-long version of Black Coffee In Bed
- Meeting Paul Merton. And Tim Burgess.
- Seeing Prince in concert finally. At the O2 in London which was spectacular. Screamed so much when he played 1999, I'm not sure how I had any voice
- The Scissor Sisters in concert- top quality fun. That whole weekend was pretty damn great actually
- Learning to use hotwax. Having armpits like a 7 year old again is wonderful. Shame it only lasts around 2 weeks.
- Leaving my job. Yes I may not have found another job but I really am so much happier without it.
- My wonderful friends. And I've really learnt this year who they are.

Not so good things:
- the late year run of breaking things (camera, earrings, glasses)
- the depression that's accompanied me not working. And the loneliness. Normally both are manageable but things got a bit too much for me in November and I had to get out of here. The guys
- vegan cheese!!!!
- not being well- I seem to have had a cold on and off for most of the autumn . And I got that wonderful rash all over my jaw and neck that affected me at Glasto....
- finding out who my friends really aren't. Helping people and getting absolutely zero in return.

New Years Resolution:
- Not to be so trusting, helpful and open with people, especially those I've just met to avoid getting hurt and just being used. I'm too nice sometimes and I need to stop going out of my way to help people when I should be helping myself a bit more.
- Decide really and truly what to do with my life and change situations that I am not happy about
- Accept the things I can't change and change the things I can
- Do more Vegan Weeks again
- Lose weight, get fit, yadda yadda yadda

Happiness And Joy

2007-12-19T18:48:00.000+01:00

Today's posting was going to be the annual round up but I've had quite a nice

Firstly I had a relatively pain free experience at the unemployment office here. I didn't spend any money, I resisted buying naughty drinks and when I got home after 11am I felt so full of energy that I started cleaning my flat. I cleaned my bedroom (dragging the drawers out from the wall to get rid of the dust behind it) did some ironing, and I finally got round to finishing the year long process of copying all my videos on to DVD which meant I could have a bit of a sing a long with Paul Weller as I was cleaning.

Then I went down to see my friend Elena and her little boy to give him his Christmas present. I had a great time playing cars with him and wiping his nose because . I got his Crimbo pressie right too- turns out he loves Bob The Builder so I got that right. He is really gorgeous, he's going to be such a heartbreaker when he's older. He's got really blonde hair that sticks up all around the front. At one point I told his mum that I was going to steal him and take him with me to England for Christmas and pretend to the outlaws that he was mine and the boyf's... hee hee hee

I felt so Christmassy walking from Elena's to my next destination, Hoey's to drop off her Christmas present. It was nice and chilly outside, lots of people have lights in their windows as I walking along and I felt so happy after seeing my two buddies and there was a bloke outside a supermarket dressed as Santa powering one of those hand turned wooden piped music boxes

And it is my oldest friend's 30th today. Trying to get hold of her on the phone. This means that my 30th is not too far away. Oh shit.

The only sad thing about today is that it is 7 years since we tragically lost Kirsty MacColl. RIP. If you've never heard her do me a favour and download (legally please!) or buy her last and best album- Tropical Brainstorm. Magic from beginnning to end.

I'll Give It To Someone Special

2007-12-10T23:28:00.000+01:00

I want to be whisked away to a log cabin somewhere high up in the mountains with snow falling heavily outside, a roaring fire to dance to Wham! and The Pogues.

Hello? Is it me your looking for?

2007-11-27T01:50:00.000+01:00

Um. So yeah. Like hi. Long time no 'speak'. Hope all is well with whoever may be reading this.

So I have left this a very long time, to the point that I was considering dropping my blog alltogether. But I will persevere. For the moment anyway.

What's good for me to tell you about? Rugby is going well- we started playing 15s and aren't doing too badly considering. Almost got hypothermia after some stupid people decided they wanted us to play in a fucking hailstorm (!!!) a few weeks back and on the same day got a whack around the nose to the point where I thought it was broken. Everything is on track relationship wise which makes me very happy and I am lucky to have some good friends around too. I'm not sure I appreciate either of these enough though. And of course my continuous pride and joy- my little sisters.

On the downside- I really haven't been feeling myself at all lately. I won't go too much into the details. It's all very complicated. But if you live near me and fancy taking me out for a drink sometime I would appreciate it muchly. Or just drop me a line sometime soon and tell me how much you care about me- that helps too :)

Normal service will resume soon.

It's The Time Of The Season

2007-09-05T01:27:00.000+02:00

Another blog from the safety and comfort of my bed. What bliss. I am also accompanied by the lovely Christopher Eccleston. Sadly he is in digital format and steadfastly refuses to leave Doctor Who which is currently playing and join me sub-duvet.

So I had to do a google search for today's blog title/lyric cos it's all about zombies* and I absolutely refuse to have anything to do with the godawful Cranberries. The Rach and I went to the cinema tonight to see 28 Weeks Later (follow up to 28 Days Later, starring the delectable Cillian Murphy) which has finally come out on the cinema here. I love the first film- utter genius with some breathtaking shots and the aforementioned Christopher is in it too- and while the second one wasn't as good as the first one, it's still fabulous. They make use of what feels like most of Central London as a movie set, the main actors are all very good, ther. e's a couple of jumpy bits, buckets of blood and even I had to close my eyes at a particularly gruesome part. The Rach and I had a good giggle at their liberal usage of London geography too. Anyway- comes highly recommended, especially if you liked the first one.

* Okay, okay, before any other movie geek pulls me up on it, I know that technically the 28... films are not zombie films because it's a transmittable virus that causes them to be in that state, rather than death followed by reanimation. However, they remain zombie in spirit, splatter and appeal.

Party Over, Oops Out Of Time

2007-08-30T11:01:00.000+02:00

hello all, long time no blog and all that.

Reason being that life feels pretty boring nowadays. Unemployment is slowly losing it's novelty and I really need to start deciding what I should be doing from now on. It's starting to demotivate me and make feel not all that happy. It's still better than working and I know that my decision to leave my previous job was the right one. As long as I keep telling myself this I should be alright!

It shouldn't be- this month I've been to Hamburg for a long weekend (loved it, would love to live there) and I just got back from a weekend in London which was just amazing. The boyfriend got us tickets to see Prince in concert which was indescribably good and I was so shocked when he played some of my favourite Prince songs (1999 and Kiss) but he only did one encore as apparently loads of people were leaving during his last song which pissed him off so no Raspberry Beret, When Doves Cry or Gett Off. We also did some shopping in London and went to the British Museum and a tour of the House of Commons. We hung out with my family and it was sunny the whole time. This is also not contributing to my low level of happiness factor right now.

Rugby training has started with a vengeance but I couldn't be arsed to go last night. I had a very valid reason- my little toe on my left foot is all messed up. I'm used to getting blisters on the bottom of my feet but not on the top and side of a toe. At least I think it is a blister because the little bumps are full of liquid but they've also gone slightly red. It's really sensitive too and doesn't like being in shoes.

Anyway, enough of my medical problems. I need to get out of bed and start doing things and getting organised (oh yes, that's my other news, on my last official day in my old job I decided to invest in a new laptop. Her name is Louloubelle and she is gorgeous and allows me to blog and watch DVDs from the safety of my bed. Blissssssssssss)

We've Got To Shift These Colour TVs

2007-07-31T22:54:00.001+02:00

People who've seen me in the last few months have probably heard my 3 favourite telly moments. I have now found links to two of them online:

1. Miss Piggy and Billy Crystal re-enacting *that* scene from When Harry Met Sally. I started to think that maybe I'd dreamed this because it's just so fecking funny and could not work out why it wasn't on YouTube. Now it is at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P4O0ftwqZn4 forward to 3 minutes 40 seconds

2. Jarvis Cocker on Shooting Stars doing a 'pulling' question on Shooting Stars. Just take a look at it here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CXFfyTz1NEE

If I ever find number 3 online to share with you all I will die happy. I found it recently on one of my videos but the quality is appalling. Back in about 1991, Comic Relief decided to do a competition for kids to write a pop song about one of the issues they raise money for and the grand prize was you would get to record your song, perform it on Going Live and be on Smash Hits too. To publicise this, Going Live did a film about it asking 'pop stars' like Take That, East 17 and Betty Boo for advice about how they go about writing a song interspersed with clips from everyone's favourite comedians- Trevor and Simon. The bit where they are doing songs as The Singing Corner in the style of other people is pure genius. See if you can guess what the songs are from my depiction below:

"Erotic, erotic, la la la la la la la la. E-rot-ic, E-rot-ic run your fingers through my beard"
"My name is prince/ the one and only/ My name is prince/ I'm a little bit funky/sha la la la la la la la la"
"Rhythm is a dancer/come and swing your pants-ah/Sha la la la la la la la la"

As I said pure genius

It's Been A Long Time

2007-07-26T18:36:00.000+02:00

So at the request of my many thousands of readers (read gayboy) who've been patiently awaiting an update- here you go. There's too many things to cover so I'm going to have to do this in point styley:

- At the end of May I turned 25. Oh alright, I turned 29. Not particularly happy about it but then there's not much I can really do to stop it.
- I dragged the boyf to his first Glastonbury. It rained a lot so it was wet and muddy and apart from a drunken mishap caused by someone else on the last night it was completely brilliant. Particular highlights: Gareth Jones doing escape from cling film (again!) which I caught on video, Glenn Tilbrook singing Black Coffee In Bed late on Friday night with all of us in the audience doing the backing music, meeting a buddy from the internet for cider, meeting Tim Burgess. Roll on next year!!!
- The infamous Heather is here from the US with two friends. My flat is a little squashed and now they're off in Paris but we're having fun.

And now the big news. I am no longer working. I finished at my office on the 29th of June and am on vacation till the end of July. From the 1st of August I'm with a transfer company who help find us jobs and sort out our CVs etc. That lasts for 6 months and I get 80% of my salary whilst doing it. I haven't decided what I'm doing yet but I am quite content to take the time and the financial help to make that decision.

Tied To The 90's

2007-06-04T00:52:00.000+02:00

I can't remember if I've posted this or not:

How you know you experienced the 90's
1) You once used Wella Plum mousse or Sun In in your hair that you thought was totally original and stylish
2) You thought blue mascara looked good on EVERYONE
3) You could do or tried to do the Prodigy step
4) You owned or longed for an Adidas three stripe tracksuit
5) You owned a compilation tape with TOP TUNES such as "Mr Vain", "What is love" and "Rhythm is a dancer" on it
6) Hour long debates on who was better? East 17 or Take That
7) You judged a girl on who she fancied from Take That! (Robbie: you were cool, Gary Barlow: you were not!)
8) For all you die hard East 17 fans: "Outside it's raining, inside it's wet!"
9) You owned a pair of Nike Air Max
10) Going into town with £5, getting the bus there and back, lunch and a top with it!
11) Running on the spot dancing!
12) You wore leggings/cycling shorts with long t-shirts
13) You owned a Bennetton / NafNaf / Ton sur Ton jumper
14) You owned scrunchies in an array of colours
15) You went to or dreamed about going to a Smash Hits concert
16) You bought Smash Hits for the song lyrics and the immense amount of stickers that you would stick everywhere!
17) You had a pen pal
18) You watched Sweet Valley High after school
19) Then on a Saturday afternoon you watched Catchphrase, Gladiators, Generation Game, Noels House Party and then Casualty
20) You wore black opaque tights with a wrap round skirt
21) Just 17 and More magazines had the best problem pages
22) 10p crisps!
23) A grey Fruit of the Loom jumper was a must have
24) Sharkie & George were the crime busters of the sea
25) Puffa jackets
26) You used the line "it's a free country" every day
27) Do the Bartman "I didn't do it, nobody saw me do it, you can't prove anything"
28) Impulse body spray
29) Woodies alco pops were the best thing EVER!
30) Don't forget your toothbrush and Big Breakfast with Chris Evans
31) You had at least one troll
32) You know the dance to Macarena and Saturday Night. You also tried to scat like Scatman John!
33) You watched Baywatch and longed for the day that Eddie & Shauna got together! You fancied Eddie (Billy Warlock) too!
34) You watched Byker Grove
35) You went into Body Shop to put on Vanilla or White Musk perfumes
36) Shellsuits & bumbags!
37) You longed to live in Beverley Hills 90210
38) Fruit shaped soaps that usually came from Body Shop for your birthdays 39) You owned the TLC album
40) Fruit salads and black jacks!
41) Strike it lucky on a Sunday night with Michael Barrymore when he was straight & married
42) Chain letters 43) You had fake ID

Ask Yourself This Question

2007-05-30T21:53:00.000+02:00

- Is it sad to be excited to spend 40 minutes tomorrow in Cologne station because of the good food and shopping opportunities?
- When will this bloody cough go?
- Will my plants continue to thrive over the weekend while I am away?
- Is it too late to phone the bride and groom or will they be panicking about the nuptial event on Saturday?
- Why do I continue to have skin like a teenager?
- About 60% of my friends on Facebook are 'met randomly'- is that sad?
- Where is my tax print out from last year?
- Is 28 Weeks Later going to be on at the cinema oop north so can I watch it this long weekend?
- Where is Fabuleuse?
- Will everything go wrong because- OMG- Hazey takes a few days off from the office?

This Summer We've Pulled All The Sheets Off The Bed

2007-05-21T22:11:00.000+02:00

Brain engages mouth
Mouth expresses thoughts
Of how we shared those fun fair rides
Beneath the darkness of the night
Time can crowd the head
Like a sardine can
The summer that began to blur
Has put us on the calendar

This summer there won't be a cloud in the sky
I'm so made up I feel I could take off and fly
This summer we've pulled all the sheets off the bed
I'm so happy I can't get you out of my head
This summer I am so in love with you

Mornings pass us by
As curtains hide the sun
Nights we spent out of control
Like two flags wrapped around a pole

I see the helter skelter lights
And hear the music in the breeze
And when we're skimming stones tonight
It feels so good that you're with me

This summer there won't be a cloud in the sky
I'm so made up I feel I could take off and fly
This summer we've pulled all the sheets off the bed
I'm so happy I can't get you out of my head
There's no reason to ever feel lonely again
This summer I am so in love with you

What's The Story (no Morning Glory)?

2007-05-07T20:37:00.000+02:00

Whoops. I managed to forget my logon name hence no posting for a while.

In the meantime:
- I have been to the Wasen and got shockingly, disgustingly drunk. We think it was around 4 and a half masses. I made up lots of songs but they all had the same tune (Brown Girl In The Ring). My favourite was about Geekboy and went "Geekboy and mini Geekboy- Sha La La La La La" repeat ad infinitum
- I went to see Spiderman 3 at the first showing at our local cinema and I enjoyed it muchly. Tobey Maguire is really rather nice....
- My rugby team was crowned champions after we won our final two games in our league at the weekend and we go through to the final (which I will miss because it clashes with Glastonbury). I recorded about 50 seconds of one of our games and it's got some good action on it-check it out at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cHp7nobDe0A
- I have lizards that run around on my terrace!

And Don't It Feel Good?!

2007-04-24T22:34:00.000+02:00

We had a wonderful rugby weekend last weekend. After training on Friday Nats and I headed down to the Irish pub for a pint or two and to meet Hoey who had some friends over from England and upon leaving the pub heading back to my place (sans one of Hoey's friends) we found the jacket potato place that Kezza had told us about a few weeks before so that was dinner sorted.

After waking up at some godforsaken hour, getting lost on the outer Munich ring road and slathering myself in factor 50 sun cream against the 28 degree heat we went out on to the pitch for our two games of 10-a-side rugger. We played a tough game against our hosts and eventually won it 29-5. I didn't play because we were too many but I did get to play the first half of the second game which we won 62-5!!!! I felt really good when I came off the pitch (although a bit shattered due to the heat) as I thought I'd played quite well, an analysis confirmed by our trainer who told me that that was the best game I'd ever played!!!! Nats later told me that he was stood next to her on the sidelines and he kept saying "who's that running all over the place? Oh wow it's Hazey!" We had a couple of lineouts and my fellow lifter and I got our liftee really quite high up, she was no heavier than a feather. The only downside was our friend Schlumpf going off with a serious knee injury just before the half time whistle and even that's not 100% negative- she had such a blinding game and a half that she was voted player of the tournament. Upshot of this is- we qualify for the next part of the competition with one tournament left in 2 weeks time, we can lose both of those games and still qualify- yay!

Then on Sunday we went to watch our boys play and win their league too, thrashing their opponents 72-0! Their coach told me afterwards how happy he was, it was the best they'd ever played etc. But they weren't as good as us.

Thank God we're not playing this weekend though. I do love it but I also need some time to do some other stuff like go to the Wasen and spend some quality time

We Don't Need No Education

2007-04-17T21:18:00.000+02:00

Inspired by a conversation Curlygirl and I had over Easter, the booksI have read off the BBC's Big Read List*. In green, books I've read, ones in pink are books I love

The Lord of the Rings, JRR Tolkien only the first one- too bored to read the others!
Pride and Prejudice, Jane Austen
His Dark Materials, Philip Pullman
The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Douglas Adams
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, JK Rowling
To Kill a Mockingbird, Harper Lee
Winnie the Pooh, AA Milne
Nineteen Eighty-Four, George Orwell
The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe, CS Lewis
Jane Eyre, Charlotte Brontë
Catch-22, Joseph Heller
Wuthering Heights, Emily Brontë
Birdsong, Sebastian Faulks
Rebecca, Daphne du Maurier
The Catcher in the Rye, JD Salinger
The Wind in the Willows, Kenneth Grahame
Great Expectations, Charles Dickens
Little Women, Louisa May Alcott
Captain Corelli's Mandolin, Louis de Bernieres
War and Peace, Leo Tolstoy
Gone with the Wind, Margaret Mitchell. Am going to read this over the summert-1002 pages!
Harry Potter And The Philosopher's Stone, JK Rowling
Harry Potter And The Chamber Of Secrets, JK Rowling
Harry Potter And The Prisoner Of Azkaban, JK Rowling
The Hobbit, JRR Tolkien
Tess Of The D'Urbervilles, Thomas Hardy
Middlemarch, George Eliot
A Prayer For Owen Meany, John Irving
The Grapes Of Wrath, John Steinbeck
Alice's Adventures In Wonderland, Lewis Carroll
The Story Of Tracy Beaker, Jacqueline Wilson
One Hundred Years Of Solitude, Gabriel García Márquez
The Pillars Of The Earth, Ken Follett
David Copperfield, Charles Dickens
Charlie And The Chocolate Factory, Roald Dahl
Treasure Island, Robert Louis Stevenson
A Town Like Alice, Nevil Shute
Persuasion, Jane Austen
Dune, Frank Herbert
Emma, Jane Austen
Anne Of Green Gables, LM Montgomery
Watership Down, Richard Adams
The Great Gatsby, F Scott Fitzgerald
The Count Of Monte Cristo, Alexandre Dumas
Brideshead Revisited, Evelyn Waugh
Animal Farm, George Orwell
A Christmas Carol, Charles Dickens
Far From The Madding Crowd, Thomas Hardy
Goodnight Mister Tom, Michelle Magorian
The Shell Seekers, Rosamunde Pilcher
The Secret Garden, Frances Hodgson Burnett
Of Mice And Men, John Steinbeck
The Stand, Stephen King
Anna Karenina, Leo Tolstoy
A Suitable Boy, Vikram Seth
The BFG, Roald Dahl
Swallows And Amazons, Arthur Ransome
Black Beauty, Anna Sewell
Artemis Fowl, Eoin Colfer
Crime And Punishment, Fyodor Dostoyevsky
Noughts And Crosses, Malorie Blackman
Memoirs Of A Geisha, Arthur Golden
A Tale Of Two Cities, Charles Dickens
The Thorn Birds, Colleen McCollough
Mort, Terry Pratchett
The Magic Faraway Tree, Enid Blyton
The Magus, John Fowles
Good Omens, Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman
Guards! Guards!, Terry Pratchett
Lord Of The Flies, William Golding
Perfume, Patrick Süskind
The Ragged Trousered Philanthropists, Robert Tressell
Night Watch, Terry Pratchett
Matilda, Roald Dahl
Bridget Jones's Diary, Helen Fielding
The Secret History, Donna Tartt
The Woman In White, Wilkie Collins
Ulysses, James Joyce
Bleak House, Charles Dickens
Double Act, Jacqueline Wilson
The Twits, Roald Dahl
I Capture The Castle, Dodie Smith
Holes, Louis Sachar
Gormenghast, Mervyn Peake
The God Of Small Things, Arundhati Roy
Vicky Angel, Jacqueline Wilson
Brave New World, Aldous Huxley
Cold Comfort Farm, Stella Gibbons
Magician, Raymond E Feist
On The Road, Jack Kerouac
The Godfather, Mario Puzo
The Clan Of The Cave Bear, Jean M Auel
The Colour Of Magic, Terry Pratchett
The Alchemist, Paulo Coelho
Katherine, Anya Seton
Kane And Abel, Jeffrey Archer
Love In The Time Of Cholera, Gabriel García Márquez
Girls In Love, Jacqueline Wilson
The Princess Diaries, Meg Cabot
Midnight's Children, Salman Rushdie

* I have read a couple of Terry Pratchett's but I have no idea which ones they were. I think Mort and The Colour of Magic so the true figure is actually about 37. Not too shabby

Oh Eddie Eddie, Eddie, Eddie, Eddie, Eddie, Eddie Stein

2007-04-15T12:40:00.000+02:00

I read an interview this week online with the wonderful Eddie Stein which brought back some fantabulous (my new word) memories. Whaddaya mean you don't know who Eddie Stein is? Check it out here: http://www.barnetfc.premiumtv.co.uk/page/News/LatestNewsDetail/0,,10431~1009443,00.html

Speaking of sport- running around a rugby pitch in 27 degree weather whilst wearing a black 100% polyester shirt IS NOT FUN. We went eastwards yesterday for a rugby tournament and one of the other teams was short of players so I went to play for them with a couple of others from my team. They had enough players for the position that I normally play in and when one of the other girls went off injured in the first game I took her place and played out of position. It was actually good fun playing for another team (except for getting smacked in the ear, having a very high tackle on me by some bitch and the bruises all over my knees and elbows) I gave everything I had (which isn't a whole lot) and played over 3 and half of the 4 games we had and although we lost all our games we didn't play too badly actually. Most interesting was the game when I played against my own normal team. Steffi was desperate to tackle me and didn't manage it- hah!- and even gave my team a penalty when she came offside against me.

Come to think of it I actually played football for a bit yesterday- during a game I was chasing the ball and was about a metre ahead of my opponent so I had no possibility to pick it up which meant I had to resort to kicking it along gaining some distance up the field until it finally went out for a line out. This was also done only with my left foot- quite an achievement as if I was a footballer I'd be totally right footed.

Born Of Frustration

2007-04-13T22:12:00.000+02:00

Scenario: friend at work (lets call her Leprechaun) asks me to install something on her new PC. It doesn't go right and I don't know enough so I have to contact the support team for the application. To cut a very long story short someone from the sub-continent tries to fix it for over 90 minutes with no luck and totally fed up so I call the guy.

Me: Hello is that XXX?
XXX: Hello? Hello?
Me: Hello this is Hazey
XXX: Hello? Hello?
Me: Am I speaking with XXX?
XXX: Yes this is XXX.
Me: So hi, I'm Hazey Jane, I need to know how much longer this going to take
XXX: Oh, is this Hazey Jane?
Me: Yes this is Hazey- let me just conference Leprechaun on the phone
***Leprechaun comes on the phone too and I am shocked that XXX is still on the phone***
Me: So is application installed?
XXX: Yes
Me: And does it work?
XXX: Yes
Me: okay let me try it
***I'd already seen the errors and knew it would not work. Point being he told me it did***
Me: It does not work. Can you get it fixed tonight?
XXX: I deinstalled then reinstalled.... hello?
Me: Yes- we're still here keep going...
XXX: I deinstalled then reinstalled.... hello?
Me: Yes- we're still here can you please keep going?
***You can already here Leprechaun getting huffy***
XXX: We have this problem (starts rambling on- you can barely understand the guy. I have no difficulty at all with accents but his grasp of english is just so poor I can understand my 4 year old sister better with her baby voice on the phone)
Me: Right well we need this to be fixed tonight. Can you do that for us?
XXX: errrr... shuey, shuey (rambling starts)
Me: Excuse me?
XXX: Someone in Europe had this problem yesterday too
Me: Okay but we need this to be fixed on this PC today.
Leprechaun: Look I need this this weekend- what can be done?
Me: What do you need from me to be able to get this done this weekend, do you need me to talk to your manager?
XXX: Hello.... hello?
Me: Yes, we're still here. Look- is there anything that I can do to help you get this fixed today?
XXX: Tier 2.... tier 2.... you have to log a call with Tier2....
Leprechaun: You need to log a call
XXX gets his colleague YYY to join us who can actually
YYY: Hello this is YYY (couldn't actually hear the name)
Me: Hello- can you fix this issue tonight?
YYY: We deinstalled then reinstalled...
Me: Yes XXX already told me that
YYY: And we need to ask Tier2...
Me: Yes I've heard that. What do I need to do to get this solved tonight?
YYY: Maybe you need to log a call with Tier2?
Me: No, there's no maybe about it. You need to do that and you need to ask them to help us solve this issue tonight
YYY goes away. We sit on the phone- I start trying to ask XXX something
XXX: Hello? Hello?
Me: Yes we're still here. ***I'm clearly getting nowhere and start to think bollocks to this, let's go straight to the manager now but I need the name of YYY***
Me: What's the name of your colleague please?
XXX: Hello?
Me: Yes hello, what is the name of your colleague?
XXX: Er...
Me: What is the name of the man who was just on the phone with us?
***XXX starts rambling and clearly has no clue what I'm asking him. I rack my brains thinking how else can I put this and my voice turns to dangerously soft***
Me: At the moment there is you, me and Leprechaun on the phone. There was someone else on the phone. What is he called?
***Colleagues around me listening in start laughing. I can't believe it either***
Me: We were four people on the phone, at the moment we are three. Who was that other man who was just on the phone?

***Eventually YYY comes back on the phone, he is at least able to tell me his name but can't fix the problem and cannot promise to get it done that day. I decide to get the manager involved, leave him a voicemail asking for a call back which he doesn't but at least he gets someone to fix the problem. I will call manager next week if he doesn't return my voicemail cos I am not letting this one slide. I personally find it totally unacceptable for companies to offshore/outsource jobs to cheap countries and to provide such terrible service back. I mean for fucks sake this eejit could not even understand 'what is the name of your colleague?' when spoken in my native speaker neutral accent. I have no idea how my colleagues in other european countries cope. Actually I do- they don't, they find it worse, they can't even understand the accent.

I call Leprechaun out of exasperation and she promises to buy me some beer ***

You Can't See Tits On The Radio

2007-04-12T21:48:00.000+02:00

Some alien appears to have logged into my blog account

So yeah- the Scissor Sisters were fab. Curlygirl and I were planning on just hanging around the back of the venue so we could get some dancing in but we bumped into our friend Soo from rugby who was stood right at the front with her friend so in the end we ended up about 5 rows from the front. We had a really good view of the antics of Jake Shears (I would fancy him like mad if I was a gay man) and Ana Matronic who is going up on my list of people to dress up and pretend to be. If you really wanna know, the others are Debbie Harry and the girls from the B52s. We whooped, shimmied, pranced, preened and hollered all the way through it.

As it finished quite early we went down to the pub in town to drink some more and bumped into some of the rugby boys. After the 2nd pint of Guinness of the evening (on top of the vodka and beer) the rest of the evening is a bit of a blur although I do remember seeing my friend Nick's beer belly- a sight not to be missed. Back at my place Curlygirl became the 3rd member of 'the wall of shame' and I'm not sure that I was 100% sober when I went into work today. I spent most of the day hiding behind my sunglasses and gripping on to the table as the waves of nausea came over me...

All in all- a great time was had by all. Curlygirl went back to England today and I am very sad.

THE SCISSOR SISTERS CAN KISS ,MY

2007-04-12T01:44:00.000+02:00

si it is 01.44 jin the mornign and i hafe just ome home fromteh sicorror sistes conmcert/ They were fantabulous as were teh after parety imn Biddys.

O got a set listit comprosises of:
She's My Man
Laura
I Can;t Decide
Tits Onthe Radio
Skins
LOights
Paul McCartney
Ksiss You oFf
Filtyh /Gprgeous (my fave sciss sisters gong)
Everybody Wants The Samne \Thing
ELand Of A Thousand WOrds
Treansistor
Comrforetably Numb

Take oYour Mama OPut
I don't Feel lie dancing

Take Your Mama Out

2007-04-11T15:56:00.001+02:00

Is there anything nicer than an SMS that says "I have dinner planned and will have it ready for when you get in"?

I love you Curlygirl. You're fab.

I Think I'm Turning Japanese

2007-04-03T22:23:00.000+02:00

2 things worth blogging about today- despite the pain in my sore finger

(1) Porn at work: The Grauniad's digested read (spoof of a real published book) today had me in fits of giggles and turning around to make sure that no-one was stood behind me reading it. Read it at http://www.guardian.co.uk/g2/story/0,,2048715,00.html

(2) Danny Baker's daily talk show (BBC London, UK time 3-5pm) is normally good quality stuff and always worth a listen. Today's show was of a different calibre with tracks by David Bowie, Dodgy and an excellent phone in topic- phantom animal, people calling in telling their stories about brushes with ghostly animals.

I burnt the tip of my middle finger right on the bit where it hits the buttons on the keyboard taking cakes out of the oven. I decided to take my frustration out on dough rather than the wall again.

Late night addition to blog- I lied above. The other thing really worth blogging about and better than number 1 and 2 combined is 'My Life In Serious Organised Crime' by one of my all-time comedy heroes Mark Thomas as broadcast on Radio4. Do go and check it out. It is funny as fuck

Frankly Mr.Shankly

2007-04-02T19:35:00.000+02:00

I wish this yo-yoing shit would stop.

Yesterday am- 100% superduper hyper-excited as we were one of the lucky 175,000 to get tickets sorted for Glastonbury. Bring it on - I soooooooo need it right now.

Yesterday pm- totally pissed off due to being let down again by a so-called friend. I've written something out here 4 times and deleted it cos I'm fairly sure you'll read this... I'll leave it at this- given all the stuff I've helped you out with over the last few months- of course I'm going to be annoyed, that you don't realise this makes it worse and popcorn/beer MIGHT go some way to making it up.

Yesterday pm- go out with my rugby girls instead and have a brill time drinking beer in the sunshine, discuss what knob-ends (copyright Hoey, previously Catherine the Great- see I told you I'd use it!) then out for dinner at the Mexican for lots of lovely stodgy cheesy mexican food and Sangria.

Today find out whilst I'm at work that I'm being slagged off on the internet in a "Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back" type way- it's totally unpleasant and uncalled for and is making me feel like a total piece of shit. Ordinarily I'd deal with it a lot better but given that it feels like everything else that is going on in my life right now (plus the other gazillion things I've not posted on here like crap skin feels mostly negative this is the last thing that I need.

Give A Wham Give A Bam But Don't Give A Damn

2007-03-31T11:50:00.000+02:00

I had the most shittest day at work that I can remember in a long, long time. Basically I've been working on something for about two weeks now, finished it off and sent it to someone else to work on and then half an hour later someone called me and told me she'd undone a lot of the work that I'd been doing which I then spent the next FOUR AND A HALF HOURS having to redo and correct. She was crying on the phone when she told me so of course I couldn't shout at her which I really wanted to do so instead I bottled it all up and almost fainted/cried.

This week I watched Drop The Dead Donkey series 3 on DVD again which is the series that has all the classic "Gusisms" in it. So in honour of my crappy day I changed my MSN handle to 'Hazey- head/desk interface repeated motion situation' and present to you the following corporate bollockspeak from Gus, which insported my name change:

- Are we sniffing round the bottoms of the opposition?
- I'd just like you to stir-fry something in my think-wok.
- Morning hotshots! Are we cooking with napalm? You bet!
- There is just something I'd like to pop into your perculator, see if it comes out brown.
- We do rather appear to have an ongoing underwear entanglement situation...
- We've got to downsize our sloppiness overload.
- Could we interlock brain spaces in my work area?
- Coach, if I could input into your mental mainframe for a moment...
- Morning talent base! Are the afterburners on full thrust? You bet!
- Yes, well, publicity-wise this is a rather regrettable gonads in the guilotine situation.
- We're merely running our bulletins through the cappucino machine of innovation, see if it comes out frothy.
- Jill, could you come for a brief scuba in my think tank?
- Helen, if I could just park in your mental multi-storey a moment...
- You see, when it comes to sexual interfacing with the female gender group, I've always been caution-orientated due to ongoing problems of an adaptive nature regarding the gooiness factor on the physical front.
- Let's opperate a zipped-lip scenario on this one.
- Sorry, Helen, had a bit of a composure shortfall earlier.
- George, can we pool our brainspaces in a centre of excellence?
- I'm in major cellular rejuvination mode, fast tracking my way to eternal biological viability.
- From now on I'm going to employ relaxation techniques to turn off stress river and mosey gently down contentment creek.
- Problems are just the pregnant mothers of solutions.
- Today is tomorrow's tadpole of opportunity.
- I feel a very real sense that we ought to be wary of running any unsubstansiated stories if we're to avoid a faeces and fan situation.
- Yes, well, I sense we may be straying down tangent boulevard here.
- We all need to go on a forgivness curve.
- Look, Henry, if it's any help, I do have a sleep area over capacity situation.
- Look out Mummy, the snake wants a reproductive interface.
- The three of us can go back and get into some real pro active recreational interfacing...
- It's an anti verminous defecation deterrent. ("It's to stop pigeons crapping on the building")

Woah Woah You've Got The Best Of My Life

2007-03-29T20:10:00.000+02:00

Everything feels a bit weird at the moment- sometimes I feel so positive about things and then I get so depressed about others... I seem to be going up and down more often than a yo yo

Bad
- I've not been feeling well the last few days, getting another stupid cold again and feeling totally rundown even though I've got no reason to. Today I felt naseous, faint, shivery and sleepy and fully expected to collapse at some point today. At least that didn't happen.
- A friend of mine is leaving work and I'm sad about that
- I'm sad that tomorrow is Phill Jupitus' last gig on breakfast show on Radio6 (mind you, I still miss Fat Phill's Friday Mixed Grill on good old GLR)
- I really need to start sorting out the paperwork and life decisions that are currently cluttering
- My sleep is disturbed by the people upstairs- the ceiling is so thin above my bedroom I hear them talking and yawning for christsakes. I'm going to have to go up there at some point and kindly ask the knobend up there if he wouldn't mind going into the bathroom/kitchen/living room when he wants to talk to someone else. Thank god I haven't heard them shagging yet

Good
- Curlygirl is coming soon! So is the infamous Heather and her buddies!
- We are hopefully going to get our Glastonbury tickets on Sunday
- My ex-sort-of has got a permanent job at the company I work for and I'm pleased for him and his family.
- I am watching live rugby this weekend
- I should hopefully leave work soon (leaving date should be mid June, need to put it down for the boss and get approval)

I think I'm going to cheer myself up and call my oldest friend and her ickle babby and see how they are

In Other Words

2007-03-27T20:28:00.000+02:00

A general newsy type update blog or just some song lyrics?

Ah bollocks, I'm not feeling well at all and I'm going to spend the rest of the night feeling sorry for mysel on the sofa and I can't find the song I actually want to put on here so this will just have to do.

Wayne County and the Electric Chairs
If you don't want to fuck me baby, baby fuck off
If you don't want to fuck me baby, baby fuck off
I ain't got time for yesterday's news
Don't shoot me up with your bullshit blues
If you don't want to fuck me baby, baby fuck off

If you don't want a piece of the action, baby take a walk
If you don't want a piece of the action, baby take a walk
I don't like when you're playing with my knees
You ain't nothing but a prick tease
If you don't want a piece of the action, baby take a walk

If you don't want to fuck me baby, baby fuck off
If you don't want to fuck me baby, baby fuck off
You think that you're hot shit I heard
You ain't nothing but a cold turd
If you don't want to fuck me baby, baby fuck off

If you don't want to fuck me baby, baby baby fuck off
If you don't want to fuck me baby, baby baby fuck off
Baby, baby baby fuck off
Baby, baby baby fuck off
Baby, baby baby fuck off
Baby, baby baby fuck off
Fuck off fuck off fuck off fuck off fuck off baby

In another words, if you ain't got time to talk a walk with me on my meat rack
Then you can just get the hell right out of my breadline
Yeah, fuck off baby

Baby You're The Skywalker To My Luke

2007-03-25T20:33:00.000+02:00

This will probably only make sense for the buddys that I was out with last night but here's the Goldie Lookin' Chain video for Your Mother's Got A Penis: http://www.youtube.com/share?v=wAZTLVJSlNw&embed=1

The Goldie Lookin' Chain website is at http://www.youknowsit.co.uk/lowtech/ and it is safe as fuck- go download some tracks and check out the other videos.

You knows it.

Going To A Movie (CONCERT!) Feeling Kind Of Groovy

2007-03-21T10:21:00.000+01:00

Having bemoaned the lack of decent live music in my town in recent months I suddenly face the prospect of being totally broke as a load of good gigs have suddently been announced: Tori Amos, The Pet Shop Boys and Ash are all playing here in May.

Even if I have to go on my own I'm definitely going to see Ash, which will be the 5th time I've seen them. And I'll probably hang around afterwards and see if I can kiss Tim Wheeler again ;-)

I would really like to see the Pet Shop Boys and they're playing in a nice small venue with good acoustics so that might be my birthday present to myself. Last Glastonbury I had planned to see Tori Amos but I went to see The Highliners again instead. So we shall have to see on those...

And then there's the fabulous Scissor Sisters and Curylgirl (who is visiting me from England!) is going to come too! Yay!!!!

The internet is still broken at home. Boo.

Always Look On The Bright Side Of Life

2007-03-19T13:01:00.001+01:00

A reader's letter from today's Grauniad newspaper

"What a great game is rugby, and in particular the Six Nations tournament! The French are happy because they won, the Irish are happy because they came ever so close to winning and the English are happy since they beat the French. The Italians are happy because they did better than they had ever done before, the Scots are happy because they gave the French a good run for their money and the Welsh are happy because they beat the old enemy. Why can't other games be more like rugby, leaving everyone happy at the end? Maybe life itself should become more like rugby!
Yiannis Gabriel
Professor of organisational theory,
Royal Holloway,
University of London"

I shall post my own rugby shenanigans on here as soon as the interweb starts working at home again.

Always Look On The Bright Side Of Life

2007-03-19T13:01:00.000+01:00

I Want You To Notice, When I'm Not around

2007-03-15T20:27:00.001+01:00

When you were here before, couldn't look in your eye
You're just like an angel, your skin makes me cry
You float like a feather
In a beautiful world
I wish I was special
You're so fucking special

But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here

I don't care if it hurts, I want to have control
I want a perfect body, I want a perfect soul
I want you to notice, when I'm not around
You're so fucking special
I wish I was special

But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here, ohhh ohhhh

She's running out....
She's running out, she's run, run, run, run....run....

Whatever makes you happy
Whatever you want
You're so fuckin special
I wish I was special
But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here
I don't belong here

The Richard Cheese version of that is particularly good

All Night, All Night, Alright

2007-03-11T22:35:00.000+01:00

Congratulations to no-one, nobody guessed the lyrics . Not surprising really as they were from a song called Hot Sex taken off Vanilla Ice's latest album 'Bi-Polar'. If you want to read the full text (I am not going to copy and paste them here, they are too awful to reproduce) then they're at http://www.vanillaice.com/lyrics/bp13_hotsex.shtml I was in hysterics when I read them and so will you. Probably. Who knew he even still had a record deal? Although I can't really talk, I loved him so much when I was about 12 and I've still got his first two albums- To The Extreme and Extremely Live- on cassette, I just haven't got the heart to throw them away, even if they only get played once every 5 years. And I still know all the words to Ice Ice Baby

I've had a great rugby/pub filled weekend. We had a great training session on Friday although I'm paying for it today- my arms are sore from getting them around our hooker's waist, my shoulders are covered in red marks from hitting the scrum machine and my arse and legs hurt from falling down the stairs going into a bar after training (my shoes were slippy as it had been raining). On Saturday I met up with loads of the girls to go and watch the games and we had a good old blether whilst watching them, particularly regarding the bodily attractiveness and suitability for other physical activities of various players. We taught Nats how to say "I wouldn't kick him out of bed for farting" in German, a very important piece of knowledge I'm sure. If we take this as the most important attribute for rugby then Scotland should not only win the 6 nations tournament but the World Cup.

Then we headed down to the pub again today for the really important game- England v France. The pub was full of people the majority of them supporting France and I did actually expect England to lose. But France was having a bit of an off day and we were able to prove that we can win a game without having to rely on the bland pretty boy Jonny Wilkinson and won 26-18. Brian Ashton bought in a lot of younger players (including a and I have a new rugby hero to replace "my " lovely Jason Robinson when he finally permanently retires from the international scene- Shane Geraghty for his incredible run halfway up the pitch dodging about 7 French players before passing the ball for a Mike Tindall try.

All in all, I feel totally inspired, nervous and excited for our first 15-a-side game on Saturday. I'm sure most of the time. If during the course of this week you see my eyes start to glaze over whilst looking into the distance I am very likely to be daydreaming about rugby (and not Vanilla Ice)

I Can Tell That You And Me Are Going To Be Friends

2007-03-07T21:34:00.000+01:00

I'm avoiding the obvious lyrical reference here (I hate that fecking song!) but I've had a brill time being with various friends since I got back from gallivanting around the US

When I got into the office on Monday morning, I got a lovely hug and was greeted with a chorus of "we're so glad you're back!!". It seems that while I was away everything went Pete Tong so it felt nice to be appreciated! First up, gayboy sent me some photos of his recent wedding so I could finally see what his husband looks like! I then spent most of yesterday sitting and working with Gothgirl and catching up with her news, met MsSweden for lunch today- the first time I have seen her in something like a year and it was like we only saw each other yesterday- and disappeared for a natter and diet coke (complete with unintended burping on my side) with Robat.

Tomorrow I will meet Geekboy for coffee who I have not seen in about a billion years, who is also getting over a horrible cold-fluey type thing and Friday means catching up with the rugger girls! I'm so lucky that I have so many lovely friends in my life right now.

Now it's quiz time:

Another friend directed me today to a 'celebrity' website via which their blog. Whilst browsing through the which contains the following, amazing rhyming couplet. Can you guess (without googling) who it is?

"And with my bag of nuts and sack full of tricks
Down for whatever all up in the mix"

Your clue is- lyrical poet. Full answer next posting!

All My Life... Watching America

2007-03-05T22:27:00.000+01:00

So now I am back from my holidays (hence no posting for what seems like aaaaaaaaages) I can tell you all about it!

First of all me and the boyf went to San Francisco to see the infamous Heather. We had a great time hanging out with her and played lots with Darwin, her adorable puss cat. We were lucky with the weather and spent a lovely few days wandering around one of my favourite cities- we visited the sealions on Pier 39, ate Ben & Jerry's, shopped and went to the museum of modern art which I really enjoyed. Apparently after we left Darwin went back to being a lazy kitty, lying around on the radiator- we think he was pining for us. Cute!

Then we popped on a plane and headed east to Colorado to hang out with our buddy who lives there. We spent a relaxing few days in the freezing cold playing pool, watching TV, doing more shopping, visited the Garden of the Gods, drove up to South Park (yes, there really is a place called South Park! it's where the creators are from) and had a look around Denver which seems like a really nice place to live.

Next stop- VEGAS! This was our proper holiday bit. We stayed at the New York New York hotel which was really cool and spent our days wandering around the hotels. We went to visit Darwin's near relations at the lion enclosure at the MGM Grand practically every day (I love lions) wandered around Caesar's Palace and the Venetian, went to see Mamma Mia! (which I am sorry to say I was not very impressed with) watched the fountains at the Bellagio, met the infamous Heather who was in town and her friend for dinner one night, at the went up the Stratosphere and got scared absolutely shitless on the drop tower ride thingy they've got at the top, got drunk and wandered around Fremont Street gambling on slot machines, won back more than we gambled and spent it on breakfast in a place 'ein bisschen wie ein Cafeteria in ein Einkaufszentrum' (I started speaking german whilst drunk) and managed to do only a bit of shopping (my lovely new Ben Sherman sweater dress). With parents living in the same state I *have* to go back- I loved it.

Which brings me nicely to the last stop on my tour. I headed upstate to their place to stay with them for a week- I hadn't seen them for about 15 months so really wanted to just be at their place and see them and my two baby sisters for a few days without the boyf and then he came down for a few days at the end.

I'm sure I'll bore you if I talk too much about the 2BS' but just let me indulge for a bit. BS1 is a really chatty energetic little blonde thing although she can be a bit moody. I loved just sitting talking to her and getting to know her, finding out all about her desire to get married when she's not even 4 years old yet. she wants to marry our dad!!!!. I especially loved the way she can't say 'th's in words so when she says mother, it sounds more like 'mudder'.

BS2 is so adorable. She has such a sunny temperament (she obviously gets that from her big sister Hazey!) a gorgeous smile, giggles infectiously and has dark blonde curls like a cherub. Her favourite words are yellow and yelling 'BUH-BYE!' . One day I was dozing off on the sofa resting my head on the boyf and she was climbing all over him and when I opened my eyes her face was about 2 cm away from mine with a huge grin on it. However I am a bit disappointed in her. She loves my boyfriend more than she loves me. He got on really well with her...

We also did a lot of shopping! I was going to put up some photos of my new purchases until I realised that they were almost exclusively pink and blue like so much else in my wardrobe and therefore not that interesting really. The other exciting things I got though were a plug in computer game so you can play Pacman and other 80's arcade games on your TV, Clerks II & A Mighty Wind on DVD as well as some CDs from my favourite store in the whole wide world- Amoeba Records in Haight Ashbury. I am seriously broke this month.

I'll put some cool photos up as soon as the boyf sends me some

Lessons Learned From Rocky 1 To Rocky 3

2007-02-06T21:25:00.000+01:00

Things I learnt by being vegan last week:

- The whole point of last week's exercise was only to see if I could do it. And I did.
- It must surely be easier buying tinned chickpeas to use to make hummous and other dishes than buying dried ones, soaking them for hours then cooking them on the saucepan
- I have no idea if I lost any weight- that was not the goal but I did feel better in a number of ways.
- I ate a lot more healthily than normal- normally I struggle but each day I'm sure I ate the recommended 5 portions of fruit and vegetables a day. Lots of lovely stir fries and salads- I didn't just eat pasta with pesto, chips and bread!
- Vegan cheese is not only disgusting but an oxymoron. I am pleased that I was brave enough to try it though....
- Eating at home was easy- I just avoided the cheese counters and all worked out pretty well.
- Eating out restricts your choices severely to salads, chips and chinese
- It is possible to live without cheese but not one that I am define

I have signed up for an account at www.emusic.com at the weekend and although I have downloaded almost 80 songs in that time, the only tracks I've managed to listen to (and are constant rotation in my flat) are:

Plug It In- Basement Jaxx
Bastardo- Charlotte Hatherley
Behave- Charlotte Hatherley (I just love the lyrics to this)
Bottle Rocket- The Go! Team (put this on and feel incredibly happy)
Happiness- Pizzaman

Monday and the afternoon is bearing down on me, I’m watching the clock and the clock is watching me

2007-02-05T14:39:00.000+01:00

With perfect timing, Billy Bragg's St Monday just came on my iPod.

http://www.billybragg.co.uk/releases/albums/england_half_english/st_monday.html

"My shift supervisor's staring hard at me" so apt- I had to (jokingly!) plead with my boss to let me go for lunch today.

That's the whole point of this blog- the perfect soundtrack to accompany life.

A Different Bob

2007-02-04T21:54:00.000+01:00

My baby was talking in her sleep
She said "Bob?", I said "What?"
She said "Bob?", I said "I'm Bob?"
She said "No. I mean a different Bob"

So I asked her the next day.
I said "Jane?" She said "What?!
I said "Who's Bob?" She said "You're Bob"
I said "No. I mean a different Bob"

My baby was run over by a truck
As she lay dying, She called "Bob"
I touched her hand and said I'm here
But she said "No. I mean a different Bob"

http://stubdaddy.com/CBJE-Bob.mp3

Pump Up The Jam

2007-01-31T23:22:00.000+01:00

me before the big experiment....
So I've made several allusions to it in a recent blog and conversations recently but I haven't officially come out of the closet and declared it for all to see: I am a vegan. Well, for one week only.

It's something that' s been on my mind a lot in the last few months- could I do it? Is it something I would want to do on a full time basis? Is it even practical given that I live in one of the top meat eating countries?

I set out to try this for one week and started last Saturday. My main motivation was actually laziness. When I got back into town from Romania, I couldn't be bothered going to the supermarket for a proper shop but I did manage to get to the organic supermarket which gave me the idea. They've got loads of vegetarian and vegan products so I thought I'd stock up and give this idea a whirl.

There are a couple of rules- as well as cutting out milk, cheese, yoghurt etc from my diet I can't buy anything which I know for certain has any dairy products in it. I have had a few pieces of chocolate which I know has got milk in but that has been my only concession so far.

For the first day at home everything went quite well because I didn't have to leave the house. My first day at work was a different matter and resulted in my subsisting on some bread and an apple although I headed home to a lovely stir fry. Before I set out to do this I didn't think I'd get past the 2nd day without giving in and eating cheese and I did indeed do this- I bought vegan cheese thinking I could slice it up and stick it in a sarnie but it was absolutely disgusting. A sort of light pink/grey in colour with a very weird texture, it was only today that I realised this stuff is meant only for heating and cooking with, not just putting in your sandwitches.

I might make some pizza to use the rest of it up at the weekend. I am also planning to make hummous and soup I bought a load of chickpeas to do this but so far had no time in the week to do this. Tomorrow's dinner is one of my favourite's which I've been making for years anyway- tofu in black bean sauce with pepper and noodles. Yum yum!!!! Anyone fancy dinner at my place?

me (hopefully) after a week of veganism:

Mental note to self: Must watch Wallace and Gromit at the weekend again...

Hope I Die Before I Get Old

2007-01-30T22:56:00.000+01:00

1. What time did you get up this morning? Woke up just before 7, staggered out of bed at 7.40
2. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? Borat. I am ashamed to say I laughed.
3. What is your favourite TV show? Have I Got News For You, Father Ted. Currently going through a big ER addiction, I watched most of series 6 at the weekend
4. What did you have for breakfast? Porridge
5. What is your middle name? Louise. I hate it. I want a better one.
6. What is your favourite food? I can't name just one so I'll just say Italian as that gives a nice broad spectrum
7. What is your favourite Potato Chip? Not easy to choose one but I do really like ready salted and beef and onion
8. What is your favourite CD at the moment? I can’t stop playing These Streets by Paolo Nutini at work. It is really, really fab
9. What kind of car do you drive? Don't have my license yet
10. What is your favourite sandwich? Cheese and tomato
11. What characteristics do you despise? Lateness, smelliness, laziness, arrogance
12. Favourite item of clothing? Anything comfy, pink or preferably both!!!
13. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would you go? Well I’m going there in about 3 weeks- the US to see my beautiful sisters. Other than that, it would have to be to Australia to see my darling Anita. Or to Glastonbury!!!
14. What colour is your bathroom? White with blue and pink accessories
15. Favourite brand of clothing? I only buy New Balance trainers and they have to be made in the UK. I don’t seem to have too much luck with jeans that aren’t Levis- they seem to fit me very well.
16. Where do you want to retire? I refer you, the jury, to today’s blog title. In the unlikely event that I do get old, I want to go and live in some old people’s community and be a hell’s granny (copyright Monty Python)
17. Where were you born? In a hospital in London
18. Favourite sport to watch? Football or rugby. I really can’t decide. Actually the only sports I won’t watch are cricket and golf.
19. What laundry detergent do you use? Stuff from DM. It smells very nice
20. Pepsi or Coke? Coke
21. Are you a morning person or night owl? I’m too grumpy in the morning so I guess I’d have to be a night owl.
22. Do you have any pets? Do the blue tits on my terrace count?
23. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share? Nah. There's not too much going on in my life right now, except the guy that tried to get me to marry his brother last week, the fact that I'm leaving my job in a few months, that I'm trying veganism for a week and had vegan cheese for my din dins tonight...
24. What did you want to be when you were little? Really tiny- I thought it might be pretty cool to be a waitress or a hairdresser.
25. Favourite candy bar? Galaxy chocolate from the UK
26. What is your best childhood memory? Looking for fossils with my dad and brother when I was about 5 on holiday somewhere in Spain one evening.
27. What are the different jobs you have had? Babysitter, worked in a toy shop, worked in a DIY shop, worked in a cafeteria, did summer camp, ran a playscheme, currently a computer wizzkid.
28. Piercing? just the ears at the moment. Contemplating doing the top of myears and/or a tragus
29. Eye Color? blue
30. Ever been to Africa ? Does Tenerife count?
31. Ever been toilet papering? No- but I’ve done it to other people (sort of)
32. Love someone so much it made you cry? oh god yes. And then I promised myself never to be so silly again
33. Been in a car accident? Yes, but it wasn’t serious.
34. Croutons or bacon bits? Oh veggie bacon bits any day!
35. Favourite day of the week? Saturday. Sleep in, football, Jonathan Ross, rugby….
36. Favourite restaurant? Can’t think of one offhand but I like diner style ones
37. Favourite flower? Sunflower
38. Disney or Warner brothers? WB
39. Favourite fast food restaurant? I don’t eat fast food.
40. What color is your bedroom? White.
41. How many times did you fail your drivers test? None
42. Besides this one, from who did you get your last e-mail? I think my buddy Winston
43. What store would you choose to max out your credit card? A decent clothes shop. If I ever find one.
44. What do you do most often when you get bored? I don’t get bored. Only boring people get bored.
45. Who are you most curious about their response to this? Anyone willing to take the time to respond
46. What are you listening to right now? Ben Folds Five- Underground on iTunes (I love this song!!! I remember hearing it for the first time and thinking how cool it was)
47. What is your favorite color? Pink!
48. Ocean, River or Lake? Swimming pool
49. Which came first the chicken or the egg? The egg. It was laid by visitors from the planet Jaasdlilew.

Dirty Cash I Want You*

2007-01-29T20:59:00.000+01:00

So even though I was terribly homesick at the end (see last posting) and all I wanted to do was get back here I did overall have a cool time, although parts of it got quite bizzare:

- Every morning and evening I walked and admired the above statue. I still have no idea who it is.

- It was very nice to be with my colleagues and see them all again- they're all so sweet and lovely. I even warmed up a lot to my least favourite one . They're all terribly sensitive though, while I was there, there were 4 crying sessions in 10 days. I get stressed at work and have a little sob every now and then but even I've never done that.

- I have learnt lots of Romanian. I can now say yes, no, and, with, for, sleep, cream, cheese, chicken, polenta, bread, soup, thank you, please, hello, goodbye, good morning, good evening, sixty and shut the fuck up you devil.

- One morning we were all in a meeting and I heard some police sirens go along the street. I thought nothing of it till we were all back in the office and I saw some people wandering over to the window. There's a construction site behind the office we're in and whilst we were in that meeting, part of a crane collapsed on top of a group of workers, killing 4 of them and seriously injuring two. For the rest of the day, the building was surrounded by police officers and TV news crews. The next day, everyone carried on like normal. Can you imagine if that was the UK or Germany? There'd be a massive investigation and work would be held up for several days whilst they ensure that everything is safe. http://english.hotnews.ro/Four-dead-in-Bucharest-building-site-articol_44129.htm

- That same day, whilst trying to cross Piata Romana (imagine something the size of Trafalgar Square) which was full of traffic as always- bumper to bumper- a police escort came by. I later found out it was Prodi of Italy in the blacked out car. Piata Romana, devoid of traffic on a Sunday afternoon

- His lordship came for the weekend. While I was at work on Friday he explored Bucharest. I think he was pleasantly surprised by the city- how friendly the people were, how cool the city is and how safe it was.

He did the one real touristy thing in the town and went here, the 2nd biggest building in the world:

At the weekend we went to the monastery at Sinai, Peles Castle (below)

Brasov, and Bran's Castle, more commonly/popularly/cashing in on a touristly known as Dracula's Castle (which despite the tacky souvenirs was actually pretty cool:

- Back home the weather struck. The first week there was a hurricane and they evacuated the office early so people wouldn't be stranded and the second week we had our first snow which came down in one great dump so people couldn't make it in to the office on Wednesday morning. Why does this stuff never happen when I am there???

- It feels like I ate my own bodyweight in cheese. Food there is so incredibly stodgy and I found it really hard to find a good variety of food. I did eat a bit of salad but even those mostly came with cheest. By the end, I was screaming for carrots, celery and apples!! The cheese could have also been responsible for my even-more-than-usual lucid dreaming. Had some very weird and sometimes distressing dreams. Have you ever woken up convinced that what you dream is real? I had the most dreadful dream in which I dreamt that a really old buddy of mine had died, and it was my first boyfriend who told me that Rob had died. I'm not sure which part of that was more distressing.... anyway Rob, if by some chance you're reading this, please get in touch, I'd love to know if you became a fully fledged alcoholic or are still practicing.

Anyway I digress. Due to the cheese situation I have decided to go vegan for a week. This means knowingly no standalone milk, cheese, butter or joghurt. In the same way that I don't go looking at the ingredients in things for no meat/fish products, I'm not actively looking for things with milk in them which means I can have a little bit of chocolate. It was pretty hard at work today- all I could eat was a plain bread roll and an apple. Moral of this story- take a packed lunch to work when going vegan!

* Sorry for today's title. I couldn't think of a proper song about an adventure or journey...

And the way I feel just makes me want to scream

2007-01-26T11:05:00.000+01:00

I've had enough of my romanian journey. I want to go home.

Travelling With(out) Moving

2007-01-14T18:47:00.000+01:00

Ahem. Apologies for Friday's posting. At least drunk typing is better than drunk writing- I once wrote a letter whilst extremely pissed on A4 paper to my then best friend which had about 20 words on each sheet. I still sent it though.

Anyway I am posting this from the hotel that will be my home for the next almost two weeks. I'm back in Bucharest to work from the office here and help out at a critical time of the fiscal year.

My preparation for coming away started out quite well. I sorted out my toiletries and other sundries (books, cables etc) which always takes the longest time quite early but I should have gotten up earlier on Saturday to do my washing and get it dry. Or even not stayed out late on Friday night and gone home after the second cocktail as originally planned. And maybe I shouldn't have spent so much time last night transferring my videos on to DVD and gone to bed before 1.45 But I didn't so at 6.45 this morning (after around 4 hours sleep- I kept waking up and wondering what time it was, even if it was only 3 minutes after I last checked the alarm clock) I was ironing my polo neck sweater to try and get as much wetness off them as I could but it didn't dry out until I was on the plane. My jeans were still a bit damp around the waist but I had no choice and they had to be worn.

After scooping up all the rubbish in my flat and dumping it in the bin and rinsing off the plates so that I don't come back to a colony of creatures living in my kitchen (again, things I could have done the night before) I hotfooted it down to the bus stop, to get the bus to the train station, to get the train to the airport. I checked the website last night for the bus timetable and chose one that would get me to the station with good time . Except I'd put in the wrong dates in and the bus I was expecting never arrived. So I waited for the next one which meant I missed my train and had to wait for the one.

But at least things started to get better after that. I never thought I would say this but thank god for Starbucks. It was open, quiet and provided a nice warm seat, hot chocolate and a cookie (terribly healthy breakfast) while I waited for the train. Then I ended up in a carriage chatting with a nice young chappy from Berlin who's moving to Stuttgart in a couple of weeks to take up a job with the train company. He asked me what the gay scene was like in Stuttgart but it was only afterwards that I wondered why he should ask me that given that we'd met half an hour before. Did I look particularly lesbian like today? I wasn't looking my best but nobody does with only around 4 hours sleep. Maybe it was the fact that I was wearing my naughty elephants t-shirt. I should have realised he was gay when he told me how devastated he was when Princess Diana died.

The rest of the journey went smoothly after that- although the airport was in chaos due to these securtiy measures- and i fell fast asleep on the plane before we'd even taken off. So even though it's only 8pm here (an hour ahead of Germany and two compared to the UK) I am not planning on staying up too much longer.

And I've managed to pack two scarves despite the fact it is about 12 degrees and I was able to wander around earlier in only a long sleeved t-shirt cos it's so fecking warm

Oh what a night

2007-01-13T01:49:00.000+01:00

Thiese friday evening after work girly cocktail evenings are turning evilly birlliant:

tonight we had Rachelle, Nats, her housemate, Catherine the Great andKeira show up. WE ended up danicing on the sides of the bar and wrote Stuttgart Rubvyg whilst holding on to the low ceiling. Which is apparently very sexy

It is the only time I have heard Block Party Banquet (no 13 oin my to p 25 most played list on itunes. played 58 times) played in Deutshcland and it was sehr gut/. And they playedlots of cheesy 80ss stuff and I like to move it mixed in with flat beat by mr oizo. So all in all a good night.

And i kept one opf my new years resolutions hich was not to waste time speaking oto uttter twats.

Apoligies for the spelling erros but am too piseed to correct them

That Joke Isn't Funny Any More

2007-01-09T12:37:00.000+01:00

This HAS to be a wind-up:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/6244153.stm

Hot Tramp I Love You So

2007-01-08T19:06:00.000+01:00

Get out your party hats, streamers, the birthday cake and let's start celebrating- David Bowie is 60 today.

I love David Bowie. Not almost as much as Paul Weller or Billy Bragg (Jill Sobule- if you ever get to read this, I was the drunken fan in Germany a few years ago who told you that Billy Bragg was my 3rd favourite man in the world after Paul Weller and David. You'll be pleased to see that Bill has moved up a notch, I'm sure) but quite a lot.

If you ignore his appearance in Labyrinth in the mid 1980's, I first got into him and his music through my cousin Matt. I was round his house when he was about 5 0r 6 and we were upstairs playing in his bedroom when he suddenly announced in quite an authoritive voice, "Do you want to listen to David?" and proceeded to put one of his tapes in the cassette recorder. He proceeded to sing along in his little voice to Starman and I was smitten. A couple of weeks later I had a copy of his Single Collection.

This is a brilliant collection- it's got all the hits covering the time period from 1969 (when Space Oddity became a huge hit) to ca. 1986 (up to Absolute Beginners) plus a couple of songs that have become very poplular. If you're looking for a good start then this is the place to go. Then, if you like the 'slightly-odd-but-still-listenable' stuff on that I'd recommend Low. It's the sound of a man entrapped in a late 70's cold war, bleak Berlin, trying to wean himself off heroin in the company of Iggy Pop. No wonder I enjoy listening to it at work... And his version of Heroes recorded in German around this time ('Helden') is a real treat

A cautionary word. My love for 'The Dame' is a grown up one which means that even I can recognise when something is dross and his back catalogue. Let's put it this way: he's not one of those artists that I am going to try and collect everything they've released. Recent albums and a couple from the 70's have had a couple of stonking tracks on them but on the whole are regarded as 'not that great'. For example- I'm Afraid Of Americans is a brilliant song that sounds 100X mega when played live. But do I really need to buy Earthling (the drum and bass album)? I think not.

I've been lucky enough to see him twice, and I hope to see him many, many more times in the future. The last time I got about 7 rows from the front and he came and sang 'Hello Spaceboy' and 'Let's Dance' right in front of me- I almost passed out I was so excited. He sings 'Under Pressure' with his bassist, Gail Ann Dorsey which sounds incredible and his pianist plays divine melodies.

If this has whetted your appetite for things Bowie related check out 60 facts about him on the BBC's website at http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/6230201.stm or check out these songs on iTunes or your o

My Favourite Bowie Songs
1. Ashes To Ashes (has given me one of my favourite ever lyrics "I've never done good things/I've never done bad things/ I've never done anything out of the blue
2. Jump They Say
3. Rebel Rebel
4. Young Americans
5. Changes

And you know what? Even though I've had "I'd rather babysit than be a nurse" (copyright Ivana Trump) as my signature on MSN and some other things recently, I still sooooooooooooooo would.

You Fancy A Drink, Just The One (or 7)

2007-01-06T11:08:00.000+01:00

The worst thing about going out on the lash is waking up stupidly early the next day. It's 11 on Saturday morning and I've already been up for a couple of hours because I couldn't sleep any more. It might actually have been a good thing to get up early for once on a Saturday and get things done in town but today is a bank holiday so everything is shut till Monday now.

Oh well. At least I won't have any excuses if the christmas tree is still up tomorrow, the washing and ironing hasn't been done and my flat completely cleaned.

Whilst out last night with La Rachelle, Nats and Nats' new flatmate, I mentioned this (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/manchester/6232547.stm) news story I'd seen on the BBC website. It's the sweetest thing I've read this week and I had tears in my eyes reading it in the office yesterday.

All Is Calm On New Year's Day

2007-01-03T20:49:00.000+01:00

A little bit later than planned due to laziness

Cool Things That Happened in 2006 (in no particular order)
- The World Cup!!! The football wasn’t great but the atmosphere and mood in Germany throughout was totally brilliant. The Trinidad and Tobago vs Paraguay game was so much fun, me, the boyf and Dobbo had a brilliant time and they're now my second favourite international team after Ireland
- Winning the rugby second division title with my team.
- Having a brilliant time in general (beerfests, watching games in the pub) with my dear friends from rugby all of whom are just fantastic.
- Seeing Paul Weller twice- in concert on his own and at the V festival
- Seeing Paolo Nutini, Fatboy Slim, Matisyahu, The Dub Pistols with Terry Hall at the V Festival

Not –so-cool Things
- The boyfriend’s grandfather passing away
- Not leaving my job when I should have done (although this has it's upside. I've reaslised last month that I'm actually pretty lucky wiuth

New places I went to in 2006
Rome
Trier
Bucharest
Wales
Passau, Straubing, Regensburg and Bechtesgadenerland (will post photos shortly- we did this last week)

Cool Things That Will Happen in 2007
- I will decide what to do with my life and taking steps to getting there.
- Continuing to have a fantastic time with my friend from rugby, starting this Friday
- I will become a good rugby player, I will try my hardest to score another try and I will pull off a dummy in a game successfully. And we will beat HRK!
- This also means getting fit and losing the weight and Christmas bulge I put on. Swimming starts tomorrow.
- Glastonbury!!!
- Visiting my family in the US. I cannot wait to see my baby sisters
- Getting married to Paul Weller
- Seeing the Scissor Sisters in April
- Japan???
- Australia???
- Surferbill and Dew's wedding

I Want A Girl With A Short Skirt And A Long Jacket

2006-12-20T22:52:00.000+01:00

My mince pies went horribly wrong this evening. Out of the first batch of 12, 8 were salvagable and I scoffed the other 4. The second batch looked lovely when I took them out of the oven but when I went to get them out of the tray a little bit later on they were totally stuck to the bottom. That mincemeat was buggery expensive as well.

I can't eat 9 mince pies so they are going to have to be scraped out and thrown away. And the wine I planned to drink tonight had gone vinegary so that had to go down the sink.

Why can't I bake?

On a lighter note- a very cool thing happened last night. I was out in town with friends from rugby for some mulled wine and then something to eat and then headed home. For those of you who don't know the location of my new flat, it's at the top of a rather big hill and to get to the top of it I generally take a bus. Last night I missed the bus connection and it was half an hour till the next scheduled one so I decided to walk home. I had Orbital's set from Glastonbury 2004 playing quietly in the background and it was very weird walking home with the theme from Doctor Who going on which turns into Chime. As I started up the last part of the hill Chime was really kicking in and then I spotted the christmas lights that someone had set up in their hedge in the garden. They were moving and blinking, almost in time with the music and the whole effect of being out in the cold with this audio/video experience going on was very, very weird. I would have stayed and had a little dance in the middle of the street if I was busting for the loo.

What Else Is In The Teaches Of Peaches?

2006-12-18T21:50:00.000+01:00

This was the first food related lyric I could think of that I haven't used before. The rest of the contents of todays song have nothing else to do with what's going on in my life. That's another story....

Anyway, I feel as sick as a dog. I cooked the most disgusting dinner tonight- it was supposed to be pasta with gorgonzola sauce but I thought the sauce was too runny so I added some cornflour to it. That was a bad idea. It looked like either a bowl of porridge (if being polite) or a bowl of puke (if not) I can feel it swirling around in my tummy right now. I'm not sure that the cheese was particularly good either. I ate a couple of spoonfuls before chukcing it away. So I chucked a pizza in the oven and managed to slightly overcook that too.

I'm baking mince pies for my colleagues for work on Friday this week. God help them.

When He First Took My Hand On A Cold Christmas Eve

2006-12-17T22:17:00.000+01:00

So I have just finished my christmas shopping. Have a couple of cards to post to send tomorrow, a bunch of emails to write and a bit of food shopping to do but after that I am all done. I am very pleased to have finished it all in good timing. Which means I can enjoy the week before Christmas with not too much stress: out with the rugby girls on Tuesday, work on Thursday and for drinks with a buddy on Friday. I'm going to make mince pies on Wednesday too.

But what I'd really love is for the snow to start falling, for a car to come and pick me up in my red dress and to whisk me off to a lovely restaurant with strong red wine, an open roaring fire and a James Bond a-like. Or maybe I should just stop listening to bloody Wham.

Instead at the weekend I was taken to Subway in Leonberg - great!

I am not looking forward to tomorrow- it's the 6th anniversary of Kirsty MacColl's death (one of the singers of this postings song) and I shall be paying her tunes on my iPod all day. RIP

You're Sweet Like Chocolate Boy

2006-12-14T22:10:00.000+01:00

I just got back from a couple of lovely days in Cologne with work. Lovely, except for the stinking cold I had for most of it, which has conveniently gone now that I could actually phone in sick. It made me realise that I actually like *all* of my colleagues, and although they can be trying at times, as a whole we had a really lovely time and I'm really lucky that they are a nice bunch. I had a heart to heart with one of them waiting for the train back home this afternoon and she helped me get my head a bit more together and put some things in perspective. I will be really sad when I leave work next year- I won't miss the work and what I do but I will miss the people I work with.

We drank Koelsch (special bitter beer served in small glasses), went to a chocolate museum/factory and I finally go into the Dom after going to Cologne twice and finding it shut. I was photoed with my mouth around a Koelsch glass- a feat that I shall be putting me on my CV I'm sure- and Mme Vedder and I were singing in the hotel bar at about 1.15 this morning.

So an update on the big soiree. Unfortunately I am sad to report that the rugby Christmas party was fairly tame this year. I did get 7000 points on singstar singing Papa Don't Preach, and Nats was still puking up in my bathroom until 6pm the next day, but apart from that there is nothing else really worth reporting.

You Forgot Cranberries Too?

2006-12-06T22:05:00.000+01:00

Things that make me happy
- walking into my flat that smells of Lush christmas soaps
- being able to go upstairs at work and have a chat with Geekboy
- my new DVDs of Drop The Dead Donkey series 3 and Serenity
- hanging out and having fun with my new friends Nats and Robat
- doing non-playing rugby things with my rugby friends
- the miniature christmas tree on my colleague's desk which was the only thing that made me smile yesterday afternoon
- Surferbill and Dewy are over from England this weekend!
- But best of all= Saturday- rugby Christmas party!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Things that are making me not so happy
- Trying to sort out going to Hamburg between Christmas and New Year is turning into a nightmare
- Nobody bought me an advent calendar this year
- I didn't get a chocolate Santa today (Nikolaus Tag)
- December turning out to be so blooming expensive. Aside from Christmas shopping the following is going on:
- My two oldest cousins turn 18 within a month of each other so they need cards and presents
- My Nan is 82 next week- card and flowers
- My Dad has his birthday (5X?) 3 days before Christmas- card and wine
- My oldest friend has just had a baby so they need presents, plus it's her birthday AND I promised to send her some German magazines so she could keep up with her German
- Curlygirl is 30 today (yes today- happy birthday to you my dearest!) - card and present and chocolate because it's the 6th of December

Why does everyone have a birthday in December? What the heck goes on in March???

And I Feel Like Some Little Paradise

2006-11-22T22:49:00.000+01:00

Hazey's guide to the perfect evening:

- Run around a freezing cold rugby pitch for 2 hours* after weeks of not going
- Get home after perfect connections on the busses and U Bahns and really appreciate being in my lovely new warm flat
- Stick leftover curry from night before in the oven
- Run warm bath with a candy cane bubble bar in it from Lush (and then be a bit peed off that they don't seem to be doing it this year)
- Stick hair treatment on whilst finding out what happened in Coronation Street that night
- Jump into bath and add lots of hot water
- Eat food whilst reading about Coronation Street and what happened in 1998
- Bed.

* I'd really like to give the impression that this is true but it's not. I spent an awful lot of time gossiping with my friend Sue. Still the bashed up, bruised and swollen nose I got from someone's head this evening should fool anyone who meets me tomorrow

Swing Low, Sweet Chariot

2006-11-22T01:14:00.000+01:00

As you can see, I've really done badly on previous promises to blog more...

Anyway, there's no more excuses for me not to blog any more- I'm finally all settled in to my new place and got internet access today! Moved at the beginning of October into my beautiful new flat. Since then I've only spent two whole weekends here: I've been to Tenerife (nice and relaxing) Brussels (twice) and Romania for work for a whole week which has meant I've hardly had any time here. But now I'm actually settled in and not planning on going to any more foreign countries until February. And that feels good.

I've missed so many rugby training sessions and not played in any games at all this season. As we've got around 20 girls coming for training each night I don't imagine I am particularly missed but I do miss it. Especially with the social event of the year coming up- the Christmas party!!! Actually my dress had to go in for adjustments to the straps the other day as they were a bit too long- which is a novelty. If only it wasn't so tight around my tummy but I've still got a couple of weeks to try and get that as flat as I can.

What else can I tell you... we are well into November but Wyclef still hasn't shown up (copyright- The Dob) Football team no 1 made it through to the 2nd round of the FA Cup but face a tough match. We also managed to win in the league meaning we went from 4 from the bottom of the league to the lower reaches of mid-table- woo flipping hoo! Speaking of perennial losers, even the England rugby team managed to win at the weekend and to round off a great sporting weekend, the All Blacks beat France. And the fact that me and some buddies watched that game from the comfort of the French pub in town made it all that bit sweeter...

A Break From The Old Routine

2006-10-31T13:59:00.000+01:00

Normal service (whatever that might be) will shortly be resolved.

In the meantime I'll leave you with this tidbit of information- I think, I really fancy Hugh Grant. How terrible is that?

we're in love with the beautiful game with no shame

2006-09-19T21:01:00.000+02:00

Feck. Feck feck feck feck feck

7 minutes in and we're a goal down to Leeds. At least the very lovely Gary Kelly got the pass in for the goal.

Ball Ball Ball Footy Footy Footy

2006-09-04T18:59:00.000+02:00

(today's blog was going to be solely about football but I was just checking out the BBC website and saw this piece of news http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/5313504.stm and couldn't resist posting it. Good. They should throw away the key)

So football. We have two main points to discuss:

Firstly- the fact that Ireland didn't get annihilated against Germany at the weekend. The boyf and I went to watch it in a pub here, after traipsing around town. There were so many drunken Irishmen around town it was incredible, the town was awash with green shirts and ginger hair. It was lovely watching the germans bond with the visitors- the atmosphere was really friendly and the Irish fans even learnt to sing 'Stand up if you're Irish' in german (the germans normally sing 'Steh auf wann du Deutsche sein') which was delightful.

Thank God for Shay Given- our keeper and one of my new football heroes- he kept us in the game with some amazing saves against the germans. The game itself was really good stuff, I expected us to lose about 4-0 but Rachelle's blokey Gav summed it most succinctly when he said 'the germans didn't deserve to win and the Irish didn't deserve to score'. And the jammy gets had tickets for the game as well. Grrrrgh.

Secondly - I am going to tell you about my second team. All my avid, regular readers know who my "first" team is (who drew 1-1 at the weekend, if you wanted to know) but I rarely mention my second team on here, who are Leeds.

Me and my football loving mates Brownie and Cazza (Brownie incidentally is my oldest friend and she has aquired that handle on here as that's where we met for the first time) at school when I was about 12/13 always supported at least two teams. I say at least because Brownie went so far as to have a team in every division as well as the 1st division in Scotland and a couple of foreign teams, normally whoever Karl-Heinz Riedle was playing for.

Anyway, initially, I supported Spurs (this is going back to season 90-91 when they won the FA Cup) but they became my second team when I started watching Barnet. Then one day my brother (Spurs supporter turned Arse) and his mate started teasing me about being a Spurs supporter and I turned round and said "I don't support Spurs any more, I support..." (quickly thought who was top of League 1, as was at the time, and who I'd seen a poster for in that weeks Match magazine and saw that some of the players were quite tasty) "LEEDS!" and since then they've always been my second team.

And can you guess who Barnet have drawn in the League Cup 2nd round in two weeks time????

And Just Like The Movies

2006-08-27T20:52:00.000+02:00

Being utterly broke I had to have a quiet weekend full of organising and sorting rather than going out and partying. I fixed some jewellery (which I am very proud of as it's saved me a good 10 euros or so paying someone else to do it- it cost me 1.15 euros instead!) and also bought some much needed smart trousers for work.

I also needed to binge on films, having seen nothing of note while I was away ( I barely saw any of my beloved Coronation Street when I was there so no chance of any films) and as the boyf was not down visiting me this weekend I went to the DVD shop and rented:

Hidden (Caché in it's original French title). Without giving too much away, it's about a prosperous couple who start receiving video recordings of their house accompanied by strange childish drawings that prompt deep-seated and long hidden childhood secrets to reveal themselves with consequences for all involved . I liked it but I didn't think it was the masterpiece that certain film reviewers (like my beloved Mark Kermode) believe it is. Very well acted and done but if you like your films to be wrapped up and neatly packaged without having to think much, this ain't the film for you. You might want to consider instead...

Day Of The Dead. It's a zombie film in which the zombies attack and eat anyone still living. Need I say more? Well, as you've asked so nicely - it was great, full of suspense and claustrophobia, with some interesting ideas about the validity of scientific testing. Really gorey- there were several bits that had me going "ewwww" and that doesn't happen very often. Clearly not as good as Dawn Of The Dead and has aged as it was made in 1985 but it was still all good, clean, family fun.

Then I went to see Superman Returns this afternoon at the cinema with my friend Hooker (she plays rugby with me she's not a prostitute if that's what you're thinking!!!) Apart from the twunts that talked all the way through it and the fact that Kate Bosworth is not fit to tie Margot Kidder's shoelaces as Lois Lane- it was fantastic. Brandon Routh was so like Christopher Reeve in his mannerisms and actions it was eery- at one point his face and silhouette merged perfectly into that of Christopher's. The storyline was a bit flimsy but the effects, the baddies and Posey Parker as Lex Luthor's girlfriend were sublime.

It was lovely that Bryan Singer dedicated the film not only to Christopher Reeve (one of my childhood heroes, see: http://hazeyjaneblog.blogspot.com/2005_12_01_hazeyjaneblog_archive.html) but also his wife Dana who died of lung cancer earlier this year.

It Would Be So Nice

2006-08-25T22:58:00.000+02:00

As quite a few things have been changing in my life recently, I thought it was time to give this old thing a bit of a revamp. It was maybe just a little bit too pink, even by my standards.

As you could probably tell from the lack of action here during the last few weeks I've not been around that much. The boyf and I did a tour of England and Wales plus my keyboard broke just before we went, I spilt wine on it while very, very drunk which buggered up the b, n and the space bar. Anyway back to the hols, we had a wicked time despite the mostly grey and crappy weather. I'd never really been to Wales, only travelling through to get to Angelsey and the ferry to Ireland, and I had a fantastic time. We went to St.Davids to go seal watching and visit Britain's smallest Cathedral, had a nosey around Portmeirion (http://www.portmeirion-village.com/) drove around the mountains yelling 'sheepies' and explored the castle, medieval town walls and Plas Mawr in the lovely town of Conwy ( http://www.conwy.com/index.html) I'd love to go back.

We spent some days with the boyf's family and headed up to the Lake District for a bit. Unfortunately the crappy weather on one of our two full days there prevented any mountain climbing but we did get to imbibe some of the local beer (http://www.hawksheadbrewery.co.uk/) which was excellent and visited The Homes Of Football photo gallery. We also saw more sheep.

Then we headed back down south to see some of my family, shopped like a madwoman in London under the evil influences of Curlygirl and I went to the V festival with The Dob. V was fairly soulless and the organisation was ridiculous (but I want start moaning about it or I won't stop). On the music side: Paolo Nutini was wonderful, the Dub Pistols were absolutely fantastic, Bloc Party and Faithless were wicked and Fatboy Slim was double ace. Mr Weller was only alright (shock! horror!) but the find of the weekend (after the Dub Pistols, who brought one of my childhood heroes on in the form of Terry Hall was Matisyahu. Never thought I'd like reggae but this guy rawks!

Here's my V06 playlist, in honour of the songs and music that made my weekend

Banquet - Bloc Party (one of my favourite, favourite songs right now)
Helicopter- Bloc Party
Positive Tension- Bloc Party - all from the album Silent Alarm
19Long Time Coming -Delays
Nearer Than Heaven- Delays- Faded Seaside Glamour
Valentine- Delays- single
Insomnia- Faithless- Reverence (does anyone know where I can get a copy of this track live?)
God Is A DJ- Faithless- Sunday 8pm
Star 69- Fatboy Slim- Live On Brighton Beach
Love Island- Fatboy Slim- You've Come A Long Way Baby
At The River- Groove Armada-
King Without A Crown (Live)- Matisyahu- Live At Stubb's
Youth- Matisyahu- Youth
Jenny Don't Be Hasty- Paolo Nutini
Last Request- Paolo Nutini
These Streets- Paolo Nutini- from the album These Streets*

*Paolo Nutini is absolutely brilliant. Please check his homepage out (on my links section under 'Spread The Word' above) and download some of his tracks, and if you like them go and buy his album. It's fucking brilliant. Thankyouverymuch

And I Can See, Hear, Smell, Touch, Taste

2006-07-26T22:55:00.000+02:00

One of my favourite, simple things in this life is catching a whiff of something gorgeous and then realising that it's me that smells nice. It happened today- one of the best things about summer is you can leave your clothes to dry in the sun after washing and they smell so nice afterwards of fresh air and fabric softener. It's been very humid again today (although not as hot as in recent days) and I could still smell how lovely my top was. The other time this happens is when I use the Endless Love body care range from Victoria's Secret, oh man I love that stuff.

My perfume for the daytime is Chance by Chanel but it feels a bit too sticky to wear in this heat but I might have to get some Prada perfume soon. Rachelle and a colleague of mine at work wear it and it's absolutely gorgeous.

Whilst we're on the subject of pongy stuff, something really weird is happening to me. I've noticed over the last year that I am getting really sensitive to different smells around me, and I can smell so much more than I used to be able to. It's getting to the point now that if I walk past only one person with a cigarette that I have to put my fingers on my nose so I don't have to smell it as the stink lingers for a good 20 metres or so and makes me feel quite ill. So I am suffering quite badly this summer with loads of sweaty people on the trams and trains around here.

As I was googling the lyrics for today's song (couldn't think of anything else about smells) I found out that Mandy Moore has done a cover version of said song. If I was Andy Patridge I'd sue or try to stop her from recording it in the first place. Fair enough- I've not heard it but I can imagine it sucks. I hate it when pop stars with zero credibility cover a great song like that (see All Saints doing Under The Bridge). What's next- Westlife doing Heroes? McFly doing Personal Jesus? Britney Spears doing Love Will Tear Us Apart?

Credible bands doing pop cover versions a la Travis doing Hit Me Baby One More Time or Ben Folds' version of Get Your Hands Off Of My Woman on the other hand are inspired....

Jules Rimet Still Gleaming

2006-07-17T20:55:00.000+02:00

Well I have been very crap about posting on here recently. Where shall we start?

Oh yes, let's start with the biggest event in Germany since the Berlin Wall came down- the World Cup.

The atmosphere here was indescribable. Everyone wherever you went was so into the football and welcoming to all the teams who came to play in our town and all the extra visitors to Germany. I took my camera into town most nights to try and capture some sense of how cool it was but I don't think I will be able to. For example- the photo above on the left is of some Swiss fans cooking fondue in the middle of the street and they'd invited some French guys wandering past to come and join them. In the town square there were three massive screens for watching all the games live on and I went down there a few times to watch some of them. The most enjoyable game I saw there was Croatia vs Australia. There was a lot hanging on that game- if Croatia won they'd be going through to the second round but all Australia had to do was draw to go through. The game eventually finished 2-2 and Croatia took the lead twice so the Croatians stood behind me and my mate Emma were ecstatically happy and great fun to hang out with but then heartbroken as Australia pulled level for the second time. After the game was really weird as well. One section of one of the main roads around here was covered in the red and white checked shirts of the Croatians outside a bunch of bars which are all clumped together and in front of them standing in the street was a line of policemen in case anything kicked off. It didn't luckily.

As you know from previous posts I managed to get us tickets for two games. The Dob flew over from England and the boyf came down and we went to see Spain vs Tunisia (which ended 3-1) and was... alright. Everyone (except the tunisian fans, obviously) was expecting Spain to win but Tunisia got the first goal in. To the left is my favourite photo from the game- me and the Dob with a bull and a matador. We found the bull first and asked the matador to come and join us but then the bull started getting scared and said "nooooooo" which was fun. Note the Spanish t-shirt and flag we've got!

But the other game we went to was just fantastic. We went to see Trinidad and Tobago vs Paraguay in Kaiserslautern a couple of hours away and spent the daytime hanging out with the Trinidadians- if that's the word- and partying with them and the germans who'd beaten Ecuador earlier in the day. The atmosphere was like a carnival and it seems that a lot of people had actually come over from the Caribbean for the game. It was the first time they qualified for the World Cup, were the smallest nation there and also had the worst ranking of all the teams- they were rated 32 out of 32. But none of that was important- we were there to party!!!

After hiking up what felt like a mountain to get to the ground we found our places and joined almost everyone else in the ground in supporting T&T. Typically for me we were sat next to the only Paraguyans in the stadium. If T&T won the game by a couple of goals and England had managed to beat Sweden they would have qualified for the second round. Of course the didn't but they got something far greater in return. Instead they won the hearts of the people of Kaisterslautern and the team should be proud of how they played. Their number 11 Dennis Edwards playing on the left wing was fantastic and one of my new football heroes. I've always liked wingers but he was cool and played his heart out, along with the rest of the team. After the game ended and they'd lost 2-0 loads of us stayed in the stadium for about 30 minutes afterwards singing and dancing aroun. Come on you Soca Warriors!!!

Aside from all that- the organisation was incredible and the Germans have to be applauded for that. In attempt to get people to use public transport all cities gave access to all services for ticket holders all day and in my town, throughout the whole of the month they ran night buses (which normally run only at the weekend) every day and the trams ran about 2 hours later than normal. I can't imagine the same thing happening in England where they'd try and fleece you for every penny you've got.

And it was an excellent PR job for Germany. The weather was beautiful which helps, we had a couple of thunderstorms late at night but for the most part the weather was about 28 degrees (somewhat surprising for anyone who was here a week and a half before it started, ie around my birthday, when there was a prediction of SNOW over 700 metres!!!) I spoke to quite a few foreigners, including a few English people, who told me what a fantastic time they were having here, how friendly everyone was and how surprised at how beautiful it is and they would come back to visit us again. Which has to be the best result of all.

If you don't believe me come over and visit us.

In my other sport- my rugby team won the 2nd division! That's right, we are the the best 10 a side women's rugby team in Germany. We had an excellent game, even if we had to go to the other side of Germany to play it. Unfortunately we can't play in the 1st division as that means playing 15 a side which we don't have enough players to do. And having watched the two bet teams (apart from us) play I think I'd be way too scared to play at that level! Besides, I only joined rugby to find some drinking buddies!!!

Okay I've rabbited on here for way too long. I'll have to tell you about my dunking in the river at the weekend, news about my job and Bicycle Boy leaving and all that at a later time.

Don't Blame It On The Sunshine

2006-06-26T23:57:00.000+02:00

I'm beat. This ceaseless heat is doing my head in.

I haven't blogged in ages- there's just too much to tell you all. Have been doing so many fabby things lately, mostly concerning the World Cup- man it's been brilliant.

Watch this space, I will be back.

I Would Go Out Tonight But I Haven't Got A Stitch To Wear

2006-06-06T21:43:00.000+02:00

What a site I looked this evening. After work I headed into town to run a few chores and called into a department store to check out the clothes from Oasis http://www.oasis-stores.com/index.php?action=gotFlash and caught sight of myself in the mirror:

- I spilt strawberry joghurt down my black t-shirt today and it wouldn't wash off
- I had to do up my new black hooded top so no-one could the joghurt and got very warm as a result
- One of my medical conditions that affects my skin is back with a vengeance. If you don't know what it is, I'm not going into it now but all you need to know is that I am not happy as it's going to take months for it to go away, having got rid of it a while ago
- My back is covered in yellowing bruises and scratches around my shoulder from wear my bra rubs whilst playing rugby
- I didn't wash my hair because it didn't need doing this morning but this evening it's looking a bit raggedy

So I didn't buy anything. The only good news is that either they've changed their sizes or I've toned up a bit- I tried on a skirt and it was mahoosive on me.

The toning up is very possible- the boyf and I walked about 10kms during this last long weekend up in the woods on the outskirts of my city and through the main garden in town again, in search of ducklings.

In other news- my flat is turning into a youth hostel. I've got my friend the Headkicker staying over before we go down to Switzerland to play rugby this weekend, then The Dob's coming over for the World Cup games and ina new development, the Infamous Heather is coming to stay with me for a few days while she's here on business. She's asked me to go to shopping in Paris for the day with her while she's over and she's going to pay my transport so fandabbydozy!!!

At First I Was Afraid, I Was Petrified

2006-06-02T14:16:00.000+02:00

Random observations/points from my birthday now that I have fully recovered.

- I saved the cake on Tuesday night. I chopped the sides off the cake so that it was square and scraped off the 'icing' sugar on the top and it looked much better. My colleagues seemed to like it, but it was very sweet.

- woke up, opened presents and cards. Most impressed with tix to see The Who next month and signed Billy Bragg (or Uncle Billy as the Dob and I call him) box set of CDs.

- had a nice day at work, managed not to do much

- went to rugby training and had some beers afterwards with the guys as one of our mates from rugby shares his birthday with me. We sang happy birthday to each other, just the two of us together, about 6 times over the course of the night

- staggered home at 3.15 am after going to the Irish pub with rugby mates (all of whom are wonderful and I love muchly) where:

most of us got very drunk indeed (I was slaughtered)
had to say goodbye to one of the guys who is leaving Germany which was sad
talked complete bollocks to Rachelle for ages
got talking to some bloke because his friend was completely drunk and bloke was yelling directions to get him round the tables etc which was very amusing. Mad bloke then bought us all tequila shots as a present
Mad bloke and I ended up talking to a french guy who insisted he was Scottish and tried talking to us
Rachelle finally dragged me up to the karaoke machine to sing. Sample conversation at this point: Hazey: 'Shall we sing it nicely or just shout it?' Rachelle: 'Nah, let's shout it' and boy did we. Everyone else from rugby who was still there came up to join us on the stage except for Glatzend Heiko who just looked very embarrassed to even be on the same planet as us, never mind the same team
Rachelle and I lost the others and ended up in our favourite bar and had a 'deep and meaningful' drunken conversation and in the end all was wicked.

I really have to stop calling my french mates and their buddies Froggies when we go out though, it's really naughty of me.

Same Old Story You Heard Ten Times Before

2006-05-30T23:35:00.000+02:00

The same thing happens EVERY year. All of my colleagues bring in the most gorgeous cakes and deserts in to the office (as per tradition here) on their birthday and I think 'oooh, I wish I could bake like that' and then start planning a couple of weeks in advance.

I went ingredient shopping tonight and managed to forget the fricking list. I wanted to bake a chocolate courgette cake (yes REALLY) but didn't get some of the things. So I've spent the whole night trying to make this http://www.deliaonline.com/recipes/iced-lemon-curd-layer-cake,1051,RC.html

It came out like this instead.

I have now removed the top layer (was supposed to be icing sugar but dumbass here used caster instead) and it looks a bit better. It is going to be very, very lemony.

The only consolation is at least I have a big bowl of lemon curd left overs to eat with a spoon. It is like eating lemon sorbet only not quite so bitter.

The picture looks wrong, it's a pizza plate so the things quite big. But still.

Off She Went With A Trumpety Trump, Trump Trump Trump!

2006-05-28T21:54:00.001+02:00

What a nice few days I've had lounging around watching movies, walking lots and going to the zoo.

Thursday was a bank holiday here and the boyf came down to visit so after a very lazy morning and afternoon we wandered off to the cinema to watch X-Men 3 which was enjoyable fluff with lots of explosions and very little substance. Afterwards we walked back to mine via the park to look at the ducklings and the few that we found were very cute. I had to work on Friday so we met Dew and Surferbill for a few drinks and dinner afterwards. Please do me a favour and read his blog at www.surferbill.com so he'll stop moaning that no-one reads it.

Then yesterday to avoid the godawful Bon Jovi concert that was on here and fully audible from my flat, the boyf and I walked over to the zoo and had a brilliant afternoon going ahhhhh at the baby meerkats, watching the baby gorillas swinging around like lunatics, talking to the fennec fox (which was all on it's own, poor thing) and trying to make the parrots talk. I even walked through the Aquarium with my eyes open the whole way round- although I did get a bit scared and had to insist on holding the boyf's hands a couple of time- so I am pretty proud. After a very nice Thai meal we rented Serenity (strange but good, I'm going to ask Mr.Infractus if I can borrow his Firefly DVDs which would make more sense of the film) and Corpse Bride which was alright.

In other news:
- the infamous Heather is coming over in a couple of weeks!!! I don't know the ins and outs but on Friday I got a message from her asking if she could stay at my place. So after The Dob goes back to the UK after the World Cup I will be on a frantic cleaning frenzy to prepare for the return of the infamous Heather to Europe. I have missed her LOTS. I am also pleased as it means she can bring me some stuff from the US that I am in desperate need of, the most important being Benadryl which is the only thing to deal with bug bites.
- I have a bug bite coming up on my chest and I am NOT HAPPY as I have no Benadryl to stop it swelling up and itching.
- Gayboy- is getting married. His birthday was last week and when I asked him what his boyfriend of about 3 months got him he answered a 'wedding contract' when I was expecting a much more horrible answer.

And that's about it till Thursday....

I've Been Looking For Freedom

2006-05-22T21:04:00.000+02:00

So. If I thought that life was weird the last time I posted, it got even weirder at the end of that week.

Friday morning around 11ish. One of the bosses who'd I'd just had a moaning session with came up to me and asked 'What are you doing next week?' I quickly thought through the week- nothing special at work but a day of on Friday to go to a wedding- and was then asked 'Can you go to Bucharest on Sunday?' After a quick cancellation of my plans with Superfrog at the weekend, a rugby tournament in Munich (which we won and are now through to the play offs for promotion!!!) and being manhandled by said boss I found myself on Sunday morning on my way to Romania.

Before Sunday I knew a grand total of 3 things about Romania (1) They shot their communist dictator on Christmas Day 1989 (2) after that, all the orphanages were opened up to the west and there were the most horrific reports of the state of the children in there (I was such a Blue Peter girl) (3) Aforementioned dictator built the biggest building there in the world. I think it was good that I had no time to prepare as I had no idea really what to expect.

And I loved it- I had a fantastic time. The people I was working with and training are soooooooooo lovely- I didn't want to leave. There were a couple of others staying in the same hotel as me and we all got on rather well- going out for dinner together at night, meeting up for breakfast together in the morning. Everyone (the other guests and our Romanian colleagues) went out for dinner to a fantastic restaurant and had a lovely time together- when I left on Thursday everyone came to kiss me goodbye.

The city itself was a little more mixed. It's such a strange mixture of ugly, concrete communism and western consumerism. I've seen 9 year old kids running around in the street at midnight in rags surrounded by Escada, Guess and designer make up shops. Arriving at the airport I realised that I was in fact scared because I just had no idea what to expect but in the end it was just amazing. I wish I had some photos to describe what I mean because I can't really explain it but I hope I get the chance to go back again, it's so intriguing. I didn't have a camera with me either so I really want to go again. And the best thing

If you're wondering, the wedding was fine, and no it wasn't mine- it was a mate of the boyf's and I got to see some of his friends I haven't seen for years including the wonderfully weird Gav. The boyf and I kept sneaking up to watch Doctor Who and the Eurovision song contest. Glad to see that Finland won!!

When You're Strange, People Come Out Of The Range

2006-05-11T21:02:00.000+02:00

This has been a very strange week in my life.

I don't know what was going on last night in my town but there were a number of weird and drunken people out on the town, on my trams as I came home from rugby training. My friend Rachelle and I were interrupted by one who insisted on speaking English to us and thus ruined the conversation and on my connecting one home, there was a very drunk bloke talking to his dog.

Strangely enough that's not the weirdest thing I've seen on the trams this week:

(1) Going up to the pub quiz there was a teenager on a tram who obviously thought he was Germany's answer to 50 cent (15 cents!!!!) He was dressed exactly like 50 Cent but in even baggier clothes (if that's possible) which looks ridiculous on anyone who isn't a gansta rapper and especially not on teenage, german boys who are whiter than I am. Underneath his baseball cap he had a bit of cloth tied round his head, and tucked into the cloth was a $1 note with half of it sticking out on the side of his head above his ear. He looked like a right wally to say the least

(2) As he got off, one of the blokes with a parrot on his head got on the tram. Let me explain. There's a bunch of buskers in town (I've spotted at least 3 of them) who play the saxophone with a real, live parrot sitting on their head. And one of them got on the tram with me this week and whistled and said 'hello' to people as they walked past it. Which was very cute and made me smile.

But the best/ yet weirdest thing that happened this week was an email that dropped into my inbox at work. I was busy in an online meeting with my eye half on my inbox when I noticed a new one and thought the name sounded strange but somehow familiar. I double checked that it wasn't spam and opened it- and it was from an old mate from Uni who I haven't spoken to since I left and who's just started working at my company in the UK. We spent a while that afternoon chatting on the work messaging system hearing about his wife and baby which was just lovely.

Walking Round London Town

2006-05-07T15:03:00.000+02:00

I wish I was in London at the moment for two reasons

1) In the sunshine it is the most fantastic city in the world bar none. Do check out LDN by Lily Allen at http://www.myspace.com/lilymusic which sums up how I feel about it.
2) There is a 42 tonne mechanical elephant wandering around and listening to coverage of it on Danny Baker's radio show on BBC London online from Friday made me really want to be there. The 5m big puppet girl involved as well sounds fantastic and I've loved looking at the pictures of kids sitting on her arms. I really can't describe what it's like, check out the photos online at http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/london/4981728.stm

But I'm not there.

I am though having a fantastic time at the moment in my quest to pickle my liver. Had a quick beer after rugby training this week and went to a brewery for someone's leaving do at work on Thursday which resulted in me getting several boys to show me their chests. Result.

Then Kezza came over on Friday night and I cooked and we headed out to an 80's night/Depeche Mode party with my friend Metalhead from work and her best mate and a good time was had by all. I danced lots, the music was fantastic and the people watching was of a very high calibre.

And then last night was beerfest night with rugby. Excellent, excellent fun although I am disappointed at the lack of attendance from my fellow ladies. I hope the situation will be reversed. We ended up at a french night afterwards where our Elvis lookalike (Curlygirl- I have to call you soon to tell you about this) tried to ply me with pasties- horrible, disgusting stuff.

You Do Something To Me.

2006-05-01T21:49:00.001+02:00

I know that you've been waiting with bated breath for my update on the Paul Weller gig last week. I've had to leave it till now as I've (1) only just come down from it (2) had no time until now. If you're easily bored/fed up of my Paul weller obsession forget this blog and wait for the next one (where I will go on about my rugby injuries)

As imagined it was fantastic. Got there really early and found out I wasn't the only one there and the venue was very smart so I didn't have to wait outside in the drizzling rain reading my book. Got talking to a group of others outside the doors to the room who'd followed him around the rest of the dates on this tour. They were from all around my huge country and met each other through the interweb and (if you thought it wasn't possible) are even more mental for Paul than me. They were lovely enough to let me hang around with them for the rest of the evening and they are my new friends (hello popkid, clau and guenterdudda and the others when you get to read this!) Turns out they'd been hanging around the venue since the afternoon and got to meet the man himself. We all stood together in a bunch right at the front of the stage, just off to the left where Paul plays. The support was excellent, watch out for Paola Nutini in the next few months, he deserves to be a big, big star. Go and download some tracks for free at www.paolonutini.com and enjoy- especially Loving You which is just mmmmmmmmmm. And he took photos of us, the audience, from the stage with a wind on camera.

The main man himself was on good form but it wasn't the best concert of his that I've ever been to but I can't put my finger on what was missing exactly, it just wasn't as good as the last one I went to. He played all my favourite songs of his (currently Sunflower, The Changingman and From The Floorboards Up) finished up with Town Called Malice and played Long Hot Summer which sounded fantastic and was a new one live for me. When he sat at the piano to play it the first person he saw looking out to the audience was me and in the middle of the song when he does the 'shoo be doo be doo be doo bah' bits he could see and hear me and this other girl Birgit singing it and dancing along. Utter bliss. A beer with Paolo Nutini as the others had arranged the previous night didn't materialise but that was the only downer.

Pics of the gig courtesy of some of the aformentioned are at http://img101.imageshack.us/img101/7277/weller5zv.jpg and Paolo Nutini http://web2.gotodoc.com/albums/album32/IMG_8487.jpg

Shoo-be-doo-be Doo-be-doo-bah!

2006-04-27T16:16:00.000+02:00

He just gets better andbetter.

Will post more when my ears stop ringing and I've had some sleep.

Sun Showered Kisses, I Felt We Have

2006-04-26T14:05:00.000+02:00

In little over 7 hours time I will be watching my Paul in concert. My poor colleagues- I am being utterly unbearable today ("what, even more so than usual???" says everyone reading this) rabbiting on and on about Paul.

Just when I think my obsession couldn't get any worse, it does*. I've listened to nothing but albums by Paul, The Jam or The Style Council for about a week now (I'm even listening to Uh Huh Oh Yeh which started this all off for me 14 years ago) and watched some DVDs last night. I planned at the weekend what I was going to wear, worked out yesterday what time to get down to the venue (I will be outside about an hour or so before the doors open) so I can go and stand right at the front in the middle of the stage. Again. For the 5th time. I'm not even drinking anything today as I don't want to have to visit the WC during the concert or lose my place at the front as I'm going on my own. I don't mind waiting, I've got my iPod and a copy of Pat Barker's 'Regeneration' in my bag to read.

You might want to avoid reading the next posting on this blog because it will only be about Paul and how wonderful he is

* Don't worry, I'm not a stalker and I don't intend to be. I've actually met people more obsessed with Paul Weller than me before. Not many, but I have.

Common As Muck Women, Stay Off Our Big Gay Roads

2006-04-20T22:21:00.000+02:00

Meh.

Lay A Little Egg For Me

2006-04-19T23:20:00.000+02:00

Today's title is double edged as it's (1) an Easter song and (2) describes one activity I got up to on my Easter hols

It seems the boyf has been very busy in recent months and has met a whole bunch of new peeps up in the lowlying country where he lives so we had a busy time of it when I went up there to visit him.

We went out for fondue (hmmmm) one night, to the cinema the next and then out to a party on Easter Sunday held by some of his mates which was very cool as the beer was free for the first few hours we were there and after that it was ridiculously cheap. We got some of his mates to come and dance with us on the dancefloor which was fun and finally staggered home at about 6am. One of his mates is very cool- he's an ex-soap star who's now a big wig in the TV industry and is a really nice chap.

(I wonder if somewhere in England there's a European girl who's just met Jason Donovan and has absolutely no idea who he is.)

Then yesterday just me and the boyf drove up to the seaside and had a lovely afternoon wandering around in the sunshine on the beach and then went to visit a bird sanctuary which was fab. We got about 30 centimetres away from some humungous owls that were sitting so close to the fencing on their cages and looked at us with mahoosive orange eyes. They were very, very cool. Attempts to make them say ' Who's a pretty boy then?' failed unfortunately. I'll have to stick up some fotos when I get sent them.

Kind of sad to be home although there is one rather wonderful thing happening in the next few days= my dear friend Bex will be here and we're going to down copious amounts of beer together- hurrah!

Cleaning Out My Closet

2006-04-11T19:26:00.000+02:00

Not my closet exactly, but my inbox, thought it was time to move all my great non-work related jokes and emails out of my work account and thought I'd share some good ones with you all.

TRY ONE OF THESE AS YOUR OUT OF OFFICE REPLY NEXT TIME YOU GO ON HOLIDAY
1. I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position. Be prepared for my mood.
2. You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of the office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn't have received anything at all.
3. I will be unable to delete all the unread, worthless emails you send me until I return from holiday on 4 April. Please be patient and your mail will be deleted in the order it was received.
4. Thank you for your email. Your credit card has been charged £5.99 for the first ten words and £1.99 for each additional word in your message.
5. The e-mail server is unable to verify your server connection and is unable to deliver this message. Please restart your computer and try sending again.' (The beauty of this is that when you return, you can see how many individuals did this over and over).
6. Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuing system.. You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive a reply in approximately 19 weeks.
7. I've run away to join a different circus.
8. I will be out of the office for the next 2 weeks for medical reasons... When I return, please refer to me as 'Margaret' instead of 'Steve'.

WORK ETHICS
1. Never walk without a document in your hands
People with documents in their hands look like hardworking employees heading for important meetings. People with nothing in their hands look like they're heading for the canteen. People with a newspaper in their hand look like they're heading for the toilet. Above all, make sure you carry loads of stuff home with you at night, thus generating the false impression that you work longer hours than you do.
2. Use computers to look busy
Any time you use a computer, it looks like "work" to the casual observer. You can send and receive personal e-mail, chat and generally have a blast without doing anything remotely related to work. These aren't exactly the societal benefits that the proponents of the computer revolution would like to talk about but they're not bad either. When you get caught by your boss - and you *will* get caught -- your best defense is to claim you're teaching yourself to use new software, thus saving valuable training expenses.
3. Messy desk
Top management can get away with a clean desk. For the rest of us, it looks like we're not working hard enough. Build huge piles of documents around your workspace. To the observer, last year's work looks the same as today's work; it's volume that counts. Pile them high and wide. If you know somebody is coming to your desk, bury the document you'll need halfway down in an existing stack and rummage for it when he/she arrives.
4. Voice Mail
Never answer your phone if you have voice mail. People don't call you just because they want to give you something for nothing - they call because they want YOU to do work for THEM. That's no way to live. Screen all your calls through voice mail. If somebody leaves a voice mail message for you and it sounds like impending work, respond during lunch hour when you know they're not there - it looks like you're hardworking and conscientious even though you're being a devious weasel.
5. Looking Impatient and Annoyed
Always try to look impatient and annoyed to give your bosses the impression that you are always busy.
6. Leave the office late
Always leave the office late, especially when the boss is still around. You could read magazines and storybooks that you always wanted to read but have no time until late before leaving. Make sure you walk past the boss' room on your way out. Send important emails at unearthly hours (e.g. 9:35pm, 7:05am, etc.) and during public holidays.
7. Creative Sighing for Effect
Sigh loudly when there are many people around, giving the impression that you are under extreme pressure.
8. Stacking Strategy
It is not enough to pile lots of documents on the table. Put lots of books on the floor etc. (thick computer manuals are the best).
9. Build Vocabulary
Read up on some computer magazines and pick out all the jargon and new products. Use the phrases freely when in conversation with bosses. Remember: They don't have to understand what you say, but you will sound impressive.
10. Have 2 Jackets
If you work in a big open plan office, always leave a spare jacket draped over the back of your seat. This gives the impression that you are still on the premises. The second jacket should be worn while swanning around elsewhere
11. MOST IMPORTANT:
DON'T forward this to your boss by mistake

Anybody who's ever had the (mis)pleasure of working with me knows that I do at least four of those on a daily basis...

And if it wasn't blindingly obvious from my last post, my special visitor last weekend was a rabbit called Wilson.

There Is No-One On Earth I'm Afraid Of

2006-04-10T22:54:00.000+02:00

As promised in my last posting on here I've been up to lots of rugby. In the last week and a half I've been to five different training sessions, been kicked in the head and smacked it on the ground in 18 hours, played in two tournaments, had to listen to a speech from a referee and our club sponsor and been out partying with the girls and boys twice.

God I love it. I know that I'm not a fantastic player and never will be but my new years resolution was to be the best player I can be and I can already feel the difference in my fitness and confidence in the game and all around me as our team improves. We won two games out of four last weekend and won resoundingly the game that we played on Saturday. Some of my mates came down to watch us and have noticed how much better we are. I messed up a few times on Saturday and had a go at the referee afterwards for giving the opposition a free kick because we weren't going into the scrum quick enough but he's my mate so that's okay.

The best thing though was getting the ball and seeing that I had some space and decided to just run for it. Someone eventually stopped me but I could just feel the difference in my legs- I just felt something inside me switch on and suddenly I was running like I'd never run before, going all out at top gear and felt so in control, well at least until the bitch caught up with me. It felt great- just wish I could do it for longer. Now that the weather has started to get better (actually that's a lie, it fecking snowed again today) and the evenings are light I'm going to start up running again. If only I had a slightly more portable MP3 player than my ipod so I could take it out with me (mental note to self: must publish workout playlist on here some time)

I also had a very special visitor this weekend to my flat- he was really quite gorgeous, warm and sweet. He had his head in my lap at one point and just let me stroke his head which was sooooo nice and soft...

Better than all the rest

2006-04-02T23:21:00.000+02:00

GRRRRR. I just wrote a really long piece and then my browser crashed and I lost what I'd written. Anyway it goes something like this...

I've found the best website in the world (possibly) at http://www.bbc.co.uk/totp/videoclips/artist/index_k.shtml

If you can't tell by the URL, it's clips from Top Of The Pops and has archive performances going back to the 60s. There's some excellent stuff on there, I've enjoyed watching Boy George spray painted in gold doing Karma Chameleon, Captain Sensible surrounded by pink bouncy rabbits singing Happy Talk, Buster Bloodvessel singing Lorraine to a blow up doll whilst dressed as Henry the VIII, Jason and Kylie (which somehow still manages to bring me out in goosebumps!!!) New Order playing Blue Monday live at a time when everybody used to mime, Neil from the Young Ones yelling mid-performance 'listen to the lyrics Paul Weller! some tracks by Kirsty... I've just been loving wallowing in nostalgia, rediscovering some forgotten songs and it's fantastic.

You've Had A Lot Of Dick, But You Ain't Had Mine

2006-03-28T21:32:00.000+02:00

So lunch with bicycleboy was cool today, although I think I might have moaned a bit too much to him about work. He gave me permission to bring you this piece of breaking news: he's applying for the green card in the US through the lottery so that he can move to Hollywood and become (and this is an exact quote here) "a big porn star" to which I almost spat my food out all over the table laughing. Bless him.

Anyway enough about b-boy for now- this is my blog, godammit. I'm enjoying the outbursts of Ken Livingstone- mayor of London and big lefty- at the moment. Let me make it clear that while I don't agree with his recent comments to a Jewish journalist (and I'm not going to repeat them here) he did call the US Ambassador to the UK a " chiselling little crook" today over the latter's refusal to pay the congestion charge in London. Good on ya Ken. I like the fact that he doesn't beat about with his words and has never compromised on his principles.

Julius Caesar And The Roman Empire Couldn't Conquer The Blue Sky

2006-03-27T23:11:00.000+02:00

Finally it seems this winter is behind us. They've been saying on the radio that it's not been as long as in previous years but it still bloody well feels like the longest one ever. We had snow as recently as last week and although I'm sure whenever I went out at night or in the daytime it didn't feel *that* cold, several records were broken this winter (I read somewhere that a temperature of minus 49.5 was recorded on the German/Austrian border) and there have been a number of incidents where buildings have collapsed under the sheer weight of snow on the roof. Anyway it looks like we can put it behind us now- the evenings are lovely and light again now the clocks have gone forward this past weekend as well as the mornings. This weekend I'm going to put a lot of my winter clothes away for storage and change my thick duvet as I'm waking up too warm.

I admired some crocuses in my neighbours garden this weekend walking to catch the train- I went to visit my best mate in her home town about an hour away and we went shopping. I managed to buy yet more clothes (have bought so many this last month) and spent a lot of money at Lush. Hmmmmm. I may not have much money to go out with then but at least I will smell good when I do. Then on Sunday me and a couple of others went down to the park and threw a rugby ball around and then I had a huge pampering session in the evening which was nice and relaxing including dyeing my hair although no-one has noticed. At all. Hmmmmm.

There were some other highlights worth nattering on about while I'm in the mood for blogging:

- getting a letter from my dear friend Curlygirl (will call you soon I promise) telling me all about the trials and tribulations of being a student teacher AND a very hot picture of Jamie Redknapp- whom I've been in love with since before I'd ever heard of Paul Weller. Absolutely beautiful to look at, huge and a great footballer in his time the only thing wrong I can think of that's wrong with him is his David Beckham-esque voice. Not good. Judge for yourself....

- Speaking of pictures, I got an absolutely gorgeous photo this week of one of my baby sisters. I admit quite happily that I'm biased cos she is my much wanted and desired sister but this one is especially adorable. It's so gorgeous I can't put it on here cos it will make you want to steal her. And you can't because she's my sister. So ner.

- Bicycle boy and I are having lunch tomorrow which I am looking forward to a lot as we don't get to see each other often enough.

The rugby season starts up again for us this weekend so be prepared for posts about bruises, tries, aches, pains, kicks and injuries- I can't wait!

24 Hours Of Power

2006-03-19T14:35:00.000+01:00

One of my favourite radio stations has finally started to broadcast over the internet!

When I was working at summer camp in Maine in America in 1997 we would listen to WCYY in the kitchen, when we woke up in the mornings and when I could on my walkman on days off. I loved it so much that when I went back to visit where I had worked a year later I frantically began tuning my radio on to WCYY as soon as we crossed the Maine/New Hampshire border and after I had found it I was ecstatic to find that it had not changed at all, in fact it was playing one of my songs from the previous summer when I found it- The Freshmen by the Verve Pipe. Walking back on to camp and seeing people I'd not seen since the last year and finding out that nothing had really changed (except for my friend Rick's hair which had gone from straight black to brown and curly after chemotherapy) and that it felt so familiar was just incredible and I spent a wonderful evening there catching up with everyone and feeling

That summer was (so far) the best of my life. In the months beforehand I'd not been happy- it was my first year at University and it was wonderful to escape the UK and get a much needed confidence boost. Whilst there I worked extremely hard but in a supportive, aring environment, met some excellent people who introduced me to all sorts of new experiences I fell into a wonderous state of unrequited lust with the most beautiful boy I've ever met and saw Stephen King's house. Now almost ten years later, while I have lost contact with most of those people I was friends with or the kids that we worked with I can still remember their names and treasure my photos of that wonderful summer (my wallpaper on my home PC at the moment is a group of us dressed as the Spice Girls) and naturally most of those are bound up in music.

For the first couple of weeks of that summer I worked in a kitchen and each morning Dom the chef would tune us in to WCYY and they'd play the Verve Pipe, Walking On The Sun by SmashMouth, Semi-Charmed Life by Third Eye Blind and Bitch by Meredith Brooks. While getting ready for our evening activities my kids and I would join my friend Rachel and her kids in their cabin and play the Spice Girls first album or cds by country star Reba McIntyre (who in my defence, I never really took to but I look back on those times with great affection) When we had a dance I could normally be found jumping about to They Might Be Giants or Green Day with my friend Rick, to the Mighty Mighty Bosstones with Jeff and Ethan, headbanging with Beth to Metallica, doing a little routine to Dancing Queen with Karin the mad nurse from Amsterdam... I wish I could go back there.

So that's why I'm so excited to hear WCYY again that I have to blog about it- it feels like being home.

Caught a lite sneeze

2006-03-10T19:18:00.000+01:00

One month without a posting from me? Woah that's bad.

I have good reasons (or excuses) I've been busy watching rugby as the 6 nations tournament started this season- the rugby I've seen has been very good a

More importantly my interweb service at home has been disrupted. Despite complaining since November last year my landlord finally got round to sending someone to come around and look at the damp in my flat and they found out that something in the shower was not connected properly so water has been leaking out into the walls since before I moved in and all across my flat. I've had to move out while they get industrial sized drying machines to dry my flat out which means no interweb and workers in my flat pulling the plug out of my freezer while I've been away for the weekend and ruining all the food inside and lots of other stressssssssful things. My PC is in the flat next door with me and no interweb connection which means no Radio 4 / 2 / 6 Music which is very frustrating.

Have also had a cold for the last 3 weeks which is getting me down and exacerbated by the flat situation. I'm sure that it's not connected to the fact that I got dressed as Lara Croft at Karneval. Karneval was cool- I got to see another lovely part of Germany and met some very nice people. I also got to meet the Prince of the Karneval and I stole his flag. I'll see if I can get a photo up at some point so you can see his hat which I tried hard to steal but ultimately failed.

The Dob is coming over for the World Cup and I cannot wait!!!! She's also (golden girl that she is) managed to get tix for the V festival so I will get to see Paul Weller (again, 8th time) and Fatboy Slim, Bloc Party, Groove Armada in August, so long as my work situation doesn't bugger that plan up.

Back On The Chain Gang

2006-02-09T21:34:00.000+01:00

Hello, my name is John and I suffer from the guilt of not forwarding 50 billion fucking chain letters sent to me by people who actually believe that if you send them on, a poor 6-year-old girl in Wagga Wagga with a breast on her forehead will be able to raise enough money to have it removed before her redneck parents sell her to a travelling freak show!

Do you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give you, and everyone to whom you send "his" email, $1000? How stupid are we? "Ooooh, looky here! If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I'll get laid by a model I just happen to run into the next day!" What a bunch of bullshit! Maybe the evil chain letter leprechauns will come into my house and sodomize me in my sleep for not continuing a chain letter that was started by Peter in 5 AD and brought to this country by midget pilgrims on the Mayflower.

Fuck'em.If you're going to forward something, at least send me something mildly amusing. I've seen all the "send this to 10 of your closest friends, and this poor, wretched excuse for a human being will somehow receive a nickel from some omniscient being" forwards about 90 times. I don't fucking care.

Show a little intelligence and think about what you're actually contributing to by sending out these forwards. Chances are, it's our own unpopularity. The point being? If you get some chain letter that's threatening to leave you shagless or luckless for the rest of your life, delete it. If it's funny, send it on. Don't piss people off by making them feel guilty about a leper in Botswana with no teeth who has been tied to the ass of a dead elephant for 27 years and whose only salvation is the 5 cents per letter he'll receive if you forward this email.

Now forward this to everyone you know. Otherwise, tomorrow morning your underwear will turn carnivorous and will consume your genitals.

Have a nice day.
Hazey

P.S. Send me 15 bucks

All I Gotta Do Is Think Of You

2006-02-07T21:31:00.000+01:00

I have had a most excellent Paul Weller day today.

First of all I woke up this morning and the first thing I saw was Paul Weller- gazing at me from the wall next to my bed. Heading in to work today I listened to 'Here's A New Thing' on my iPod by Paul Weller.

Paul Weller was playing live on the radio this morning and having a chat with Phill Jupitus and I listened online at my desk. Paul Weller was really on top form (as were the rest of the band) and I think I might have been a bit rude to one of my colleagues- she came over to chat just as Paul Weller was talking and I kind of turned back round to listen to Paul Weller

In the afternoon while working I listened to Sunflower (my alltime favourite Paul Weller song) and The Changingman (my second favourite Paul Weller song and the one that opens my favourite Paul Weller, as well as my favourite ever, album)

Then, when I got home from work, I checked some concert websites and PAUL WELLER IS PLAYING HERE IN JUST OVER TWO MONTHS TIME!!!!!

What the fuck am I doing posting on here? I should be on that step machine and doing sit ups

Lessons Learned From Rocky 1 to Rocky 3

2006-02-05T19:52:00.000+01:00

Things I have learnt this weekend:

- You generally won't win an argument if you tell the other person to go and fuck themselves
- Shouting 'just catch the fucking ball' whilst watching rugby at the exact moment when everyone in the pub falls silent is generally not a great idea
- Neither is drinking malt vinegar
- Neither is painting your toenails whilst pissed
- Cleaning can be very therapeutic and when you look around you and realise what a nice clean flat you have and that you have the rest of the week free from the bathroom and kitchen
- Sometimes you just need to slob in front of good DVDs, eat Mexican and gossip with a newly acquired friend to have a good night
- Always check your email regularly- you'll find out a whole lot quicker that you've got tickets to the WORLD CUP in June- woohoo!

I've Been Looking For Freedom

2006-02-01T20:19:00.000+01:00

No time no blogging (very busy at the moment) but I HAD to post this up for you all to enjoy:

http://www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm?link_id=15042

Make sure the speakers are up loud and appreciate the Hoffmeister.

Proper posting to follow

You'd Better Smile *

2006-01-17T23:25:00.000+01:00

I clearly need to go cheese shopping more often. After all I've only got gorgonzola, mozzarella, parmesan, feta, Philadelphia and Wensleydale in my fridge

* Geddit?

I Know The Truth And I Know What You're Thinking

2006-01-15T15:47:00.000+01:00

Woah, it's been way too long since I posted on here. Happy New Year to all.

This is only a quick one, I'll write about Christmas and 2006 so far soon. But I just had to post this article I found in the Guardian over the New Year, I thought it was lovely when I read it. It was under a section of ideas for things to do with your kids:

Create your own goldrush- Joanne Mallabar
Fool's gold costs £2 for a handful of nuggets from any new-age shop. It has the appearance of gold nuggets but is virtually worthless. My dad sent some nuggets to my son, Oscar, covered in mud, claiming to have dug them up in the garden. On the note, he said he wondered if Oscar had any idea what it was and could he help to find out. Oscar took them to school, and surrounded by nine-year-olds with overactive imaginations, looked them up in a mineral and precious stones book in the library.

His suspicion, he told us, was that Dad might have struck gold in Wallingford. He contacted Dad and told him that he wanted to come down to excavate the garden. Oscar knew he was on tricky ground - there was a chance it was gold, but it might also be fool's gold and he didn't want to dash Dad's hopes. One afternoon he spent hours digging around the flower beds. Dad squared off the diggable flowerbeds on a sheet and they methodically charted the territory. To say Oscar had gold fever is putting it mildly.

After an exuberant, granddad-grandson bonding kind of day we arrived home. Oscar spent hours in his room with his microscope and books. Possibly for the first time enjoying the process of learning. He then passed judgment that the mineral was in fact fool's gold. But who would tell Grandad?

In A Quiet Way Unwind, Doing Christmas Right This Time

2005-12-22T22:27:00.000+01:00

All my Christmas shopping was done at the weekend. I am still waiting for a box of goodies to be delivered to the baby sisters but everything else is in control. My house will be clean by the afternoon of the 24th so I can truly relax.

This year will be my first Christmas in Germany as I have to work the 27th and 28th. I aim to spend my days off lying around on the sofa in pyjamas watching DVDs. So no different to the last two Christmasses then.

Great Christmas songs
* Fairytale Of New York- The Pogues And Kirsty MacColl. This is the greatest Christmas song ever. I love the lyrics, it's so bittersweet and Kirsty's voice complements Shane McGowans perfectly. Besides how many other songs do you know with the lyric 'Happy Christmas you arsehole, thank God it's our last'
* Christmas Wrapping- The Waitresses (very catchy, easily gets stuck in your head)
* Do They Know It's Christmas?- Band Aid. Forget the other two versions, the original 1984 sounds fantastic 21 years later.
* Stop The Cavalry= Jonah Lewie. It was never intended to be a Christmas song, it's actually an anti war song (if you listen to the lyrics it's obvious) but the brass sections and the one line about 'Wish I could be Home for Christmas' has marked it out as one
* Last Christmas- Wham! The all time classic. And the video is a stonker.

Let Me In Through Your Window

2005-12-13T21:25:00.000+01:00

My neighbour moved out at the weekend.

Last week I found my Kate Bush MP3s and have been singing along with her to Wuthering Heights almost non-stop since (except for Saturday night when I went out to party with the rugby lot but that's for later)

Are the two connected?

We Could Be Heroes

2005-12-06T22:37:00.000+01:00

I have been thinking about heroes a lot recently.

I accidentally put a DVD in the wrong way round at the weekend and found the specials on my Superman DVD. It comprised of three documentaries about how they made the first two films from the 70's, which was interesting- this was all before computers and the digital innovations we have now- so all stunts, explosions, action scenes, sequence and the flying had to be done 'for real' as opposed to computer graphics. There's one scene in the first film where Superman rescues Lois Lane from a helicopter that's falling off the top of a skyscraper which apparently took one year to film.

Anyway, I digress. Watching the film itself reminded me how much I used to love Christopher Reeve. When I was really, really weeny I couldn't tell that it was the same guy. As Clark Kent, I used to think that he looked like my Dad at the time. And as Superman I used to think that he was pretty darn hot. And despite it's plot holes, bad explanations and cheesiness I still love watching the film.

I've seen some of his other films and while he wasn't the world's greatest actor, I can't think of anyone else who could be more perfect as Clark Kent/Superman. So I was quite upset when he died last year of heart failure caused by pressure sores. The sores were in turn brought on by complications from his paralysis- in 1995 he had an accident while horse riding accident shattering his spine which meant he was unable to move from the neck down.

I count him as a hero for two reasons (1) for being a childhood icon (2) for all the campaigning and awareness work he did in the US and throughout the world on people with disabilities.

My second hero is Kelly Holmes who announced her retirement from athletics today. Athletics is one of my favourite sports, after rugby and football. Kelly is a hero to me because of her determination and endurance. Her personal life has been quite tumultuous (is that even a word?) and her career was blighted by injury preventing her from fulfilling her potential in the major events until the 2004 Olympic games in Athens. Entering both the 800 metres and the 1500 metres she made it to the final in both competitions.

The 800m race is incredible to watch- her weaker race and one she only decided to participate in at the final moment- she was in last place for the first 300 metres and slowly she edges her way up along the outhside of the group to take the gold medal by a whisker. Her face afterwards is pure delight: first she thinks she's got it, then she convinces herself she hasn't and then it's confirmed that she has by the announcer in the stadium- it's indescribable but I'm getting goosebumps just writing this now. I couldn't read about the race for days afterwards without tears welling up in my eyes. The 1500m wasn't quite so nail biting- it was very cleanly won but to win two gold medals so unexpectedly- wow. I wish I had a quarter of her energy, stamina and fitness, I'd be such a good rugby player. She's such an inspiration for any sports fan.

My last hero is Kirsty MacColl. I am sure I will blog about her another time but very simply- she wrote the most beautiful music and lyrics about love, life and what it feels like to be a woman. Plus anyone who pushes their son out of the way to stop speed boat killing him is a hero to me.

And if you're wondering where Paul Weller is in all of this- he isn't a hero of mine. He's my future husband.

Snow Is Falling, All Around Me

2005-11-28T21:09:00.000+01:00

Actually, it hasn't snowed here for a couple of days. We had quite a bit before the weekend.

I am trying to do my Christmas shopping. So far I am only finding things for one person. Me. If you're expecting a pressie off me, tell me what you want cos I can't think of anything except for a goat for a village in Nigeria. If you want to buy me something, part of me really, really wants this: http://www.play.com/play247.asp?pa=rnr&page=title&r=CAL&title=677445

This past weekend was quite good. I sat in the pub for most of the day watching rugby and drinking five and a half pints of Guinness which was rather nice. Then on Sunday I took a walk around the Christmas market with the boyfriend and felt quite Christmassy.

The only bad thing that happened was the complete and utter twat who made a very anti-semitic comment to me in the pub. I should have punched his lights out but then I thought I would be stooping to his level so I just turned around and walked away.

I Hope That Someone Gets My Message In A Bottle

2005-11-23T17:48:00.000+01:00

I did something really dumb yesterday. I was trying to pour water into a bottle and wondered why even though there was still some left in it why it wasn't coming out. Then my colleague Veggie Boy (I'll explain the name in a bit) told me that I should take the top off it first.....

Today and yesterday I have been off in a suburb of where I live having meetings and fun with my colleagues and actually, it was really good, although some of the meetings were boring. In the evening we went to a Cookery School and cooked for each other. Bossikins, the other girl in our department with the same name as me and I cooked a pumpkin strudel and it was delish, even if I do say so myself. I made the sauce to go with it and tried to stop Bossikins putting too much pesto in it and told him off for doing it- the teacher said I was the 'chief of the sauce' which made me very happy. I am considering adding that to my e-mail signature at work and seeing if anyone notices.

We also had red pepper soup, turkey roll (not me) with vegetables and one of our newest colleagues was in charge of cooking the cabbage and made a joking fuss about having to cook, so I am now calling him Veggie boy. To finish off we had a pear tart with ice cream which was pretty damn good.

On the whole, I really like my direct team at work, the problems I've posted about recently don't stem from them. Although I don't know most of them very well, they're a pretty good bunch, if a bit too busy at times and I got to know them a bit better over wine last night. We stayed last night in a hotel and quite a few of them stayed up in the bar till 2.30am which I was very shocked to hear about this morning! I went to bed first, at about 12.30 (just call me Grandma) and I still spent most of today trying to stay awake. I think it's because I forgot to pack a teddy bear last night.

If You've Had Enough, Don't Put Up With This Stuff

2005-11-18T22:27:00.000+01:00

Just when I though it couldn't get any worse, work plummeted to new depths yesterday. I am really, really unhappy with things at the moment, none of which I have any influence. I reached breaking point last night and had a little cry at my desk. Looking back it was actually quite funny- my boss has no idea what to do with me when I'm upset. As a direct result of all this I am addicted to chocolate and coke and not eating much, or even much else. This could be good in my quest for a flat stomach by the middle of December but I know in the long term it ain't good.

I was able to forget my woes for a few short hours and escaped to Hogwarts last night and watched Harry Potter "win" the Tri-Wizard's Cup. And very good it was too. They've cut out a lot of the book (there was this terrific build up to the World Cup Quidditch and then it just stopped, not enough Barty Crouch snr, parts of the story to do with Mad Eye Moody and) but it was terrifically well done, the effects were great and I just love Hermione. And it's got George from Drop The Dead Donkey in it too.

Question- is it really wrong to fancy Ron Weasley?

Going back to the stress thing again, I really feel like treating myself even though I have no money at all. What do you think of these?

Everybody sucks, everything is fucked

2005-11-16T22:51:00.000+01:00

I am so pissed off at what is going on at work. Without giving too much away, I am being blamed for some mistakes made by other people and I didn't have the time before now to fix it because I got dragged in to other things by my boss. I was there till 10 past 9 this evening trying to sort out as much as I could.

I missed rugby training (I was really looking forward to getting beer as well tonight from my team mates who scored their first tries for the club over the last two weekends) and I am extremely pissed off about that.

I have a huge spot on my chin- I am going to do some surgery on it with a disinfected needle in a bit.

I hate the way that no-one in this fucking country has any manners and barges past you on to the trains and trams here. That stops now. And the fuckers who insist on speaking so fucking loudly on their mobile phones. Next time they do it, I start singing along with my ipod.

Can the person who has my CV book please send it back to me? I'm starting to work on mine again now and get the fuck out of here.

I've had enough.

2005-11-14T19:53:00.000+01:00

I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want I want:

http://www.aardmarket.com/wg/productdetail.php?number=402/004

I Love You, Yes I Do, Gonna Spend All My Money On You

2005-11-08T22:32:00.000+01:00

***Cautionary note- the following post will make mention of skinheads. Now, I know that in a lot of Europe skinheads have received reputations (not always undeserved) for racism, violence and other right-wing activities too vile to name on here. I just want to make it clear that as an anti-racist/fascist etc I would never have anything to do with such groups or people. For a good introduction on the roots of skinhead style which actually comes from black working class culture have a look at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Skinheads ***

Now I've had a crappy day at work I can fully appreciate the majesty of what ranks among one of the more surreal nights of my life which happened last week.

Normally I tell people that I'm a disco baby. When I was born Boney M were number one in the singles chart and Abba in the album chart. I still love to boogie to disco tracks now. But my heart's first true and proper love is probably 2-tone. Blending classic ska music with a bit of pop and politics, I adored Madness. Then when I was working the US during my summers at University I discovered bands like The Mighty Mighty Bosstones, Sublime and Reel Big Fish who play a fantastic blend of ska and punk (spunk, heh heh) drawing heavily on 2-tone. Despite my best efforts, none of these bands have never made it big in Europe.

Anyway, I digress. The band that I loved more than Madness though were Bad Manners. Headed by Buster Bloodvessel they had their hayday in the late 70's early 80's, playing real skanking, get-up-out-of-your-seat-and-dance-around-with-a-massive-grin-on-your-face ska.

Buster was essentially famous (apart from being the singer) for two things 1) for being hugely overweight before obesity became the issue that it is now. As recently as 2001, he reportedly weight 30 stone 2) for having a really huge long tongue which he would stick out at any given opportunity. My favourite album of there's was their Greatest Hits, because the cover had something like 'The best of Bad Manners featuring Samson and Delilah, The Can-Can, Lip Up Fatty, Special Brew and many, many more..." written on his tongue. But more about that later...

So you can imagine my excitement when I found out that they were playing at a town near me in Germany and actually managed to rope some mates to come along with me. And I have to say, that it was one of the best concerts I've ever been to. The 5 bottles of beer beforehand certainly helped but the band was kicking, Buster was looking very healthy and fit, they played all my favourite songs of theirs and lots that I didn't know. I've never seen a German audience move like that and they really inspired me to dance like a crazy woman the whole evening long. Because of the movement I could get myself right down to the front and join in with the moshpit as well for a bit. The skinheads there, all togged up in proper clobber, certainly helped too (I was only looking!) and I even saw some skinhead girls there with proper Chelsea haircuts and everything. I opted out of wearing my Dr Marten boots that my mate Gordon gave me (hello Gordon!) cos I knew they would kill me when dancing.

When the concert was over, me and the others were milling around the merchandise stall helping to translate for the English bloke running it and the locals. Kezza and I managed to get some freebies out of him for helping and while we were milling around I saw some of the members of the band having a beer back in the concert hall so I went over to have a chat. After getting their first question out of the way ("Is there a border between here and Austria? What about Austria and Hungary? Is Hungary in the EU?" I will leave you to make up your own minds why!!!) I had a good chat with the trumpet player Chris about life in Germany, London and the band which was really nice.

Then just as me and the others decided to go back to the bar and get another drink, I saw Buster head off outside to get some fresh air. Being pissed I dragged StiGuy out with me cos he had the camera. I said something like "Sorry to disturb you, but could I get a photo with you please" and Mr Bloodvessel kindly obliged turning what had been a great evening into a fantastic one. I had the pleasure of buying him a beer to say thank you and then the others joined me and were milling around as well.

Being pissed(and really quite unlike me) I sort of ran out things to say... except... "Can I ask you a question? You know that album cover? Did they really write on your tongue?" and disappointingly the answer was "No, or it would still be there" (Eh? Tongues are wet???) Some other young punks standing around with us jumped on Buster at this time and he started to explain about his weight loss, he was explaining that he'd had his stomach stapled and as a result had lost 18 stone and he asked us to work out what that was in kilos for the germans. Me and the girl Kezza got chatting to some baby (17 year old) punks about London and then it was time for the lads to drag us off, after she nicked some more merchandise

So all in all a jolly good time was had by all.

Don't Do It.

2005-11-07T18:15:00.000+01:00

I went here http://www.bad-neuenahr-ahrweiler-online.de/ at the weekend, was very relaxing. The Ahr Themen baths were great. We were the only people under 40 we saw for practically the whole time.

I still have to blog about meeting Buster Bloodvessel last week, that seems a very long time ago now...

You Are As Sweet As Candy

2005-11-02T23:17:00.000+01:00

What a difference a day makes- I am so glad that October is over. It brought nothing but stress, depression and worry. I made it through the last week with no tears and without killing anyone so I am very pleased with that.

I don't know if anyone was following my postings and musings on the Barnet game (which was very much ' as it happened' ) but it seems that the boys played extremely well. The goalkeeper should have never been sent off, the red card decision was reversed days later by the FA. It ruined the chance and dream of a lifetime for our goalkeeper and the lad who was taken off so that we could put our reserve on instead. If we'd had 11 men on the pitch for the whole time we might have pulled something off. I heard the boys battled well throughout the whole game and I think they should be proud of themselves which was my hope for the game. We had a goal disallowed and pulled one back about ten minutes from time.

Now for the good stuff:

1) As hinted at on here a few posts back I got taken to see Paul Weller by surprise a little while ago. I'd been moaning only the day before that this year would be the first one since 2001 that I hadn't seen him when I got whisked off to near Frankfurt to see him as a surprise. It was absobloodylutely fantastic. A really tiny venue and I was up against the crash barrier in front of the stage. He came on with his band- my God, Steve White can whack the shit out of his skins- and they were just phenomenal. They played all of my favourite songs of his (Sunflower, TheChangingMan, Shout To The Top and A Town Called Malice) and most of the Stanley Road album including some tracks I'd never heard live before. I screamed the place down. He dedicated Broken Stones to "All the beautiful girls in the front row, to the smiley ones and the ones that aren't" of which I was one. It was just so sublime.

2) I was going to post about my Hallowe'en which was just freaking fantastic but it's still too fresh in my mind for me to post about it properly. When it's finally sunk in that I met and chatted with one of my childhood heroes this week I will tell the whole convoluted story on here with pictures.

Loves Got The World In Motion- Part 4

2005-10-26T23:10:00.000+02:00

Final score= 4-1.

I'm happy that we pulled one back and that it wasn't as bad as it could have been.

Loves Got The World In Motion- Part 3

2005-10-26T22:25:00.000+02:00

Part 3 = 3-0 down.

Love's Got The World In Motion- Part 2

2005-10-26T21:19:00.000+02:00

Graz has just had a goal disallowed for offside.

I'm not sure how much more of this I can take and we've been playing for 15 minutes.

Love's Got The World In Motion Part 1

2005-10-26T21:06:00.000+02:00

We're playing at Old Trafford right now!!!!!

Shit, our keeper has been sent off after only 5 minutes, we're down to ten minutes and they've just fucking scored.